Frerard fanfic
by ParisGrealey
Summary: This is my first Frerad fanfic so sorry if its bad XD
1. Chapter 1

"OH MY GOD!""What? What did you do now?" Dark hazel eyes studied the slowly falling white flakes outside. "Gee….not to alarm you…but…" Gerard kept an uninterested expression on his face, and turned to see his brother practically glued to the window. "But…?" he carried on after Mikey didn't continue. A childish grin filled at least half of Mikey's face. "IT'S SNOWING! Don't you love snow, Gee? Remember when I told you to eat that snow of the wall and you did and the next day you felt reall-" Gerard cut him off. "Yes, it's lovely, but Ray's already told me five times…" he trailed off, and Mikey turned to his brother with an odd little smile on his face. Gerard flinched, scared he was going to get attacked. "Guess what, Gee?""…what?""It's snowing. SNOWING!"Gerard groaned gently in frustration, and Mikey turned back to the window, pressing his nose against the cold glass, trying to see it better."It's snowing" he repeated, and Gerard rolled his eyes. "Yes, snowing".Mikey grinned again. "You don't understand.../it's snowing/"Gerard felt ready to leave the room, when a bleary eyed, and just-gotten-out-of-bed looking Frank entered, staring straight out of the window. Frank seemed to forget tiredness and a big smile came to his face. "Hey, it's snowing!" Gerard mentally cursed whoever invented snow, and lifted a piece of toast to his mouth. Before he could take a bite, Frankie waved at him as if he had never seen him before, and it was an amazing reunion. Then the younger male frowned. "Why are you putting marmalade on your toast?" he asked. Gerard looked down at his toast, then back up at Frank. He looked a mess. His hair stuck up in angles Gerard couldn't achieve without a full tub of gel, his shirt was crinkled with the patterns of his sleeping, and his eyeliner was smudged across his face. Gerard shook his head. "Well, it's either that or some bluey greeny reddy browny mould stuff in the bottom of this jar…" He grabbed it off the side, putting down his toast. Frank studied the hairy substance at the bottom and his nose crinkled. "Can we name it…umm…. Lucy?" he asked, poking the jar as if dubbing the mould. Gerard stared at his friend for a moment, then shrugged. "Okay.. Let's see what Lucy looks like properly.." he muttered, popping the lid off of the jar. Immediately, a smell so strong and foul, it made Gerard drop the jar and Frankie stumble back quickly. "Fucking hell!" they both shouted in unison, and as the smell hit Mikey, he let out the same cry and ran out of the room into his own room, to admire the snow from Frank was tempted to leave the room too, Gerard grabbed the nearest spray and pressed the button for at least twenty seconds, aiming it at the horrible splat of mould and glass on the floor. Frank stared in disgust as Lucy disintegrated slightly. Finally, the older male stopped spraying, and put it back, moving forwards a step. "I need to clean this up before someone steps on it…" he murmured, more to himself as he opened the cupboard under the sink and grabbed the dustpan and brush. Frank watched him, figuring he'd ask if he needed help. Help which Frank would probably run away from and hide in the gas cupboard, since he was the only one that could fit. Gerard sweeped up the glass and a lot of the mould silently, nose crinkled as the smell of it was still lingering. He emptied it in the bin and shoved the dustpan and brush in too, just because he couldn't be bothered to wash , Frankie spoke. About the only word that described the situation."Ew."Gerard looked across at him and nodded gently. "We'd better clean up.." he murmured, as a large splodge of the gooey mould was still splattered on the floor. It was times like these Gerard was glad they didn't have carpet in the kitchen. Frankie nodded back and moved forwards, dodging round the mould like a little child and moving to the sink. "Um… what do we use? Just…washing liquid or what?" he asked, and Gerard pulled open the cupboard again, nodding. "That should do it. I'll get Bob to do it properly later.." he muttered, grabbing the bottle and emptying about half of it into the sink. Frank turned on both taps until the sink was full of soapy water, topped with a mountain of bubbles. Frank stared into the sink, eyes looked oddly serious. He seemed to be thinking very hard. Gerard hoped Frank wouldn't injure himself doing so. "What's wrong..?" he asked quietly, and Frank turned to him with the same expression. Gerard actually stepped back a little. Frank looked as if he was about to ask a life-changing question like.. 'will you marry me?'. As he opened his mouth to speak, Gerard felt a little scared. Oh god, what was it?"I wonder what it tastes like?" Frank asked, looking back at the water. Gerard's eyes widened, but before he could stop his friend, Frank had plunged his face into the water, to taste the liquid. Gerard stood there, staring, frozen with numb shock, his jaw slack. As Frank came back up, hair plastered to his face, and bubbles covering a lot of his face, he grinned brightly. "It tastes awful!" he exclaimed, and Gerard cracked the first smile of the morning, it slowly turning into laughter. "You idiot" he said, and grinned too, using his finger to wipe the bubbles from the others nose. He shook his head and popped the finger in his mouth. His shoulders shook with a shudder at the overly soapy mixture. He pulled the finger out, and stared at the other. Both had big moronic grins on their faces. "C'mon, we gotta clean up" Frank said and turned back to the sink, grabbing a cloth from the side and putting it into the water. Gerard nodded, but his smile stuck. He was in a better mood now. Frank pulled the cloth out and moved past Gerard to get to the stain, knocking him gently. Gerard stumbled slightly, and tried to keep his balance by holding onto the side, but it was still wet from Frank's taste test, and he slipped forwards, falling straight into Frank. Frank's back hit the floor and he winced in pain, Gerard landed on top of him, their chests hitting each other. "Oh God, I'm sorry, I-I tripped and…sorry" Gerard stuttered, blushing gently, mainly because of the position they were in. Frank stared up at him, still in shock. He shook his head, and attempted to get up. Then his eyes widened, and his small smile faded. Gerard looked worried. Had he seriously hurt him? "What's wrong? Frank?" he asked, and Frank shuddered. "I landed in the mould! EW! GET THE HELL OFF ME!" he shouted, disgust taking over as he felt the sticky and warm stuff seep through his shirt. Gerard was suddenly pushed off the other, with force that Gerard never knew Frank had. Gerard landed in a heap, eyes wide as they stared at his frantic friend. Frank grimaced and tore off his shirt, still muttering 'Ew, ew, ew, ew, ew' to himself as he used the remains of his shirt to wipe the stuff off his back. "My God, that's gross!" he complained, throwing his shirt down at the mould. "STUPID LUCY!" he shouted, and moved out of the room. Gerard looked down at the mess, and then at the clock. Bob would be back soon. He'd leave it for him. He moved after his friend, trying his hardest to repress giggles in the back of his throat. Frankie had gone straight to the bathroom, turning on the taps for the sink and filling it. Gerard came in and hid his smile. "Sorry Frankie.." he said quietly, and Frank look over at him, same delighted boyish expression on his face as normal. "Hey, no big deal. I just need to wash it off, then I'm gonna take a shower and wash the soap out of my hair" he said, and soaked a cloth to wipe his back with. He tried to pull it round, but had struggle reaching it. Gerard watched in odd fascination as his friend struggled to get Lucy off his back. "Gee?" Gerard snapped back to reality as Frank called him, and he looked at him to see an outstretched hand with the cloth in it. Frank smile apologetically, "Help me?" he asked, and Gerard rolled his eyes playfully, grabbing the cloth and moving closer to him. Gerard pressed the cloth gently against the others back, and felt Frank shudder very lightly at the feel of the cloth on his skin. He moved the cloth across his back slowly, being careful that only the cloth touched his friend's skin. Gerard finished with the cloth, and put it back in the sink. "Ok, you're done" he whispered, and realised he had been holding his breath. He moved back quickly. Frank turned to him, an odd expression on his face, one that Gerard hadn't seen him do before. Gerard looked confused. Frank must have noticed, because he immediately changed his expression to the same smile he always had. "Cheers. That stuffs gross. I wonder what it was a couple of months ago?" he asked, and Gerard's worries vanished. "God knows" he answered and laughed slightly. Frank grinned and ran a hand through his hair, which still stuck out oddly. "I'm gonna take a shower now, okay?" he more stated, than asked his friend and Gerard nodded. "Yeah, sure. I should probably /try/ and clean up before Bob gets back at least..." Frank smiled in return, and Gerard moved out of the room, closing the door behind him. He sighed in relief as he was out of the bathroom, and shook his head. "Weird.." he muttered, wondering what had been wrong with him in there, and moved back to the kitchen to finish cleaning. Meanwhile, in the bathroom, Frank pulled off his boxers and shorts, and stepped into the shower, turning it to just the right temperature. As the tiny beads thundered against his back, he closed his eyes, and thought of Gerard. His best friend. Why had he reacted like that? He'd known Gee for so long…surely if…if… He didn't dare dwell on the thought, but instead tried to concentrate on the sound of the water hitting his back.


	2. Chapter 2

Red-nosed and chilled to the bone Frank, walked across the grass quickly, snow crunching under his feet. A crimson scarf was tied tightly round his neck, covering his mouth. He sniffed in quickly, nose stuffed up due to the cold. "Hey! Don't walk so quickly!" A familiar voice called to him, and Frank turned slightly, seeing Gerard running up to him. He stopped, waiting for the other, and grinned, although it was unseen because of his scarf. As Gerard caught up, he smiled to his friend, and looked across the place. It was completely deserted apart from them. Frank pulled his scarf down, and noticed the other hadn't bothered with one. "Aren't you freezing?" he asked, noticing Gerard looked completely composed, as if it was a nice summers day. Gerard turned back to him and shrugged lightly, lifting his hands to show the other his fingerless gloves, as if implying they gave him all the warmth he needed. Frank blinked at him in disbelief, but said nothing. "Wow…it's so nice. So quiet, don'tcha think?" Gerard asked, looking around again. Frank smiled an nodded, leaning down to scoop up some snow in his hands. "Yep! And, the snow here is perfect for building snowmen" he pointed out, and leaned down again to get started on one. Gerard watched him for a moment, before joining in. "And snowball fights. I saw Ray chasing Mikey earlier," he said, trying to shape the body without it collapsing "They seemed to be having fun." And then he carried on building, both of them staying silent. Before long, their snowman was complete. They'd build it with three snowballs, and added branches for arms. Frank stood back and looked at it, frowning. "It needs some clothes or something.." he muttered, and took off his scarf, wrapping it round the snowman's neck, Gerard grinned. "Oh, I know!" he said quickly, and pulled some big sunglasses from his back pocket, putting them on too. Frank shook his head. "Why do you have sunglasses? It's freezing!" he exclaimed, and Gerard shrugged. "I thought I might need them.." he said, and trailed off into silence as he realised his stupidity. Frank chuckled "Never mind." He said, and tugged on Gerard's hand. "C'mon, snow devils" he grinned in an evil way, which would have scared Gerard if he had not been Frank's best friend. Frank dropped down onto the floor, and studied the snow around him. When Gerard made no attempt to join him, Frank frowned and grabbed his hand again, pulling him down quickly. Gerard's feet slipped forwards and he felt straight onto his ass. "Ow ow ow!" he winced, and lay back, trying to ease the pain. Frank bit his lip, but still grinned. "Sorry Gee…I didn't mean to pull that hard…" he said, and lay back with him. He rolled his eyes. "Well, I'm down now aren't I?" Gerard asked and smiled, assuring him he was okay. "Let's make snow devils.." he laughed and Frank's expression brightened. They both spread their arms out wide, and their legs too, dragging them across the snow, so they printed their shape into it. Frank kneeled next to his and smiled at Gerard, who was sitting upright, shaking the snow from his hair. "They need horns, or else it's not a devil…" he pointed out, and shaped them into the snow with two fingers. Gerard did the same and kneeled with Frank, looking down at their figures together. "Look cool, don't they?" he asked, and Frank nodded, looking up as new flakes of snow began to fall. He got up and held out his hand for Gerard, as he was ready to go back and get warm now. The older male grabbed the offered hand, and Frank tightened his grip. "God, you're hands are so cold.." he said, as Gerard pulled himself up and shrugged. "The gloves were bugging me, so I took them off…but they're not too cold so.." he muttered, looking down at their hands clasped together. Frank kept his grip, not really realising what he was doing. Gerard smiled gently. "You can let go now.." he said, and Frank's cheeks flushed. He let go of the others hand quickly, biting his bottom lip. "Sorry" he said quickly. He hadn't really noticed, since their hands had felt so comfortable together. Gerard's cheeks coloured a little themselves, but Frank figured it was just his imagination. They both looked at each other, unsure what to say. Then Frank began to walk, not liking the uncomfortable silence. He sighed gently, hearing Gerard walk behind him, then jumped as he felt a hand grab his again. He turned to see Gerard shrug, cheeks more coloured now. "On second thought, my hands are pretty cold.." he said quietly, and smiled. Frank was tempted to ask why he didn't put his gloves back on, but figured that would be both inappropriate and stupid as he was enjoying this so much. They both walked back hand-in-hand, in silence. Neither complained when they had to let go as they got back, but both thought the walk home hadn't lasted long enough. Nothing was said about their hand-holding by either of them. Neither Frank nor Gerard would admit to themselves, let alone each other, what they had done was more than simple friendship. Even the other band members were starting to get suspicious of what was going on between the two of them, as the tension always seemed thicker when they were in the same room together. They seemed to struggle to even look at each other without blushing. Frank lay alone on his bed, eyes drawing patterns on the ceiling. The frustration was killing him. He needed to be friends with Gerard again, without feeling weird around him. Frank had to do /something/. He had been waiting for Gee to, but he seemed as reluctant to do so as Frank himself. Frank got up, creeping as quietly as he could down the hall and peeking in Gerard's room. He was laying in bed, eyes closed. Frank didn't think he was sleeping, as his breathing wasn't heavy enough, but it was hard to tell. He opened the door more, slowly. No reaction from Gerard. He went into the room, and knelt down next to Gerard's bed, studying the other as he rested. Gerard opened his eyes quickly, to see Frank kneeling next to him and looking down at his body. Wait, what? "Frank?" he asked, and Frank jumped, falling back and half-rolling over. "Gee- oh, I was… sorry, I didn't mean- I-I mean…" he stuttered, trying and failing to explain what the hell he was doing staring at the other as he slept. Gerard simply watched the other, frowning gently. "Um, it's okay…" he said, unsure what Frank was blabbing on about. Gerard sat up, and the two stared at each other. Frank was the first to speak up. "..I was thinking, about before.." he said, hoping that was enough to get Gerard to say something. To /explain/. Gerard nodded, avoiding eye contact. "Can we just forget about that? I mean, I'll never think of you…like that.." he frowned, unsure how to explain. "You're my best friend, Frank, and I'll be glad if it stays that way, without that getting in the way…" he finished, trailing off into silence. Frank expected him to say more, but when he didn't go on, he nodded. "Yeah… okay." he said, but a secret wave of loss had come over him. He forced himself to ignore it. Gerard was completely right, he told himself, They we're just friends. Best friends, at that, and nothing would come between that. /Then what was before about? What about in the bathroom?/Frank frowned, annoyed at himself for his silly thoughts. He put on a smile and got up. "I just...wanted to sort things out. So, we're okay now?" he asked, and Gerard nodding, putting a smile on his own face. "Of course, Frankie" he said and Frank wave lightly to show he was leaving. He left, and Gerard fell back onto his bed, feeling happy, but in complete despair at the same time. They were back to being friends again, that was great, but was that what he wanted? Or…did he want more? Gerard put his hands over his face, as if hiding himself from his bad thoughts. Bad, stupid thoughts.


	3. Chapter 3

Frank shivered lightly as he felt Gerard's cold fingers trace across his chest, moving down to his stomach. "Don't" he murmured quietly, squirming under his friends touch, though he made no effort to push Gerard away. It felt too good for him to let it stop. Giving a heart-melting grin, his friend chuckled. "Why not? It's what you want, isn't it?" he breathed onto the others bare skin. Opening his mouth to speak, Frank let out, instead, a soft moan as Gerard lips traced across his collarbone. "N-no," he managed, but Gerard laughed again. "Liar." he whispered simply, and leaned closer to Frank, lips hovering over his. Frank could feel his friends warm breath again his lips. Slowly, he parted his own, staring wide-eyed at Gerard. Then, suddenly, their lips crashed together, and both men kissed ferociously. With his mouth it a perfect 'O' shape, Mikey watched Frank sleep in odd fascination. Every now and then, he would let out a moan, or roll onto a different side. He was sweating a lot, and he had already managed to kick his blanket onto the floor. But that wasn't what was surprising Mikey. Sure, he'd never seen Frank have a wet dream before, and definitely not this violent, but it wasn't that. As he had a few times before, Frank let out another cry, uttering "Oh, Gerard!" as he thrashed in his sleep. Yet again, Mikey shuddered, thinking the idea of his brother and friend was a little disturbing. Were they really sleeping together? He wondered to himself. Oh God…when they went out the other day…were they…? Shuddering once again, Mikey stood up quickly, making his way hastily out of the room, knowing he couldn't handle that anymore. Apple stuffed in his mouth, Gerard took off his gloves, throwing them onto the table as he made his way back inside. Once his hands were unoccupied, he took the apple from his mouth, leaving a bite mark in it. "Guys? I'm back.." he said loudly, shrugging off his jacket as his eyes scanned the kitchen and living room. He frowned lightly. Where the hell was everyone? "I said, I'm back!" he called, louder this time. Once again, he got no reply. Figuring they might have gone out, he took a quick look round once he had hung his jacket up. Moving past Ray's and Bob's room he came to Mikey's. He was there alright, but scribbling on a piece of paper as if his life depended on it. "Uh.. Mikey? You okay?" he asked, wondering why he hadn't answered him when he came in. Slowly, Mikey froze, putting his pen down. He turned, an accusing look on his face. Gerard flinched, knowing there was something wrong. His brother shouldn't look like that. He should look happy. "What? What happened?" he asked, slightly demanding, moving closer. Standing up wordlessly, the younger brother gestured for Gerard to follow him. Hesitating only slightly, Gerard moved with his brother to Frank's room. At first, everything looked normal. Frank was sleeping in his bed, though the blanket was on the floor, but that wasn't exactly odd. Then Gerard froze, hearing Frank moan loudly. His eyes widened, and he laughed. "Okay, so he's having a rather exciting dream, what's so ba-" "No, oh God, Gerard!" Frank shouted, and immediately Gerard had the same look on his face Mikey had before. Horrified, and transfixed, he stared at his best friend like he was a completely different person. Finally, when he gained speech again, he muttered quietly, "Oh my God.." By now, Mikey figured they hadn't been sleeping together, since Gerard seemed so utterly surprised. Slowly, Mikey slipped out of the room, still finding it completely disturbing. But obviously, he knew it would be a thousand times worse for Gee. Letting out his friends name again, Frank gave a particularly forceful movement, and rolled on his side off tumbled to the floor. Letting out a cry of pain, he awoke suddenly, staring up at the ceiling due to his landing position. Then he realised he had been dreaming, and he frowned lightly. It was disappointing, but also a relief, since now he and Gerard could stay friends, like he wanted. Putting a hand to his head, he sighed heavily, lifting himself up off the floor with a painful groan. Turning to the door, he moved his hand away from his eyes and sighed. Then his heart caught in his chest, as he stared into the face of his mortified friend. "Shit.." he let out, body frozen from shock. For a few seconds, both just stared at each other, waiting for someone to make the first move. Then Gerard turned quickly, moving as fast as he could to the living room. He needed to get out… go…anywhere. Just not here, not with Frank like that. Staying still a few moments as his shock wore off, Frank let his face crumple. No, no! That wasn't supposed to happen! Snapping back into motion, Frank ran after Gerard, knowing it couldn't end like that. He had to explain….explain what? He was falling in love with his best friend? Groaning, he latched onto Gerard's arm just as he was moving out of the door. "No, you can't just leave! You have to let me talk to you!" he complained, clutching onto the taller male with all the strength he could muster. Gerard turned, staring at his friend with frantic eyes. "I-I can't do this, Frank. Just let me go!" he shouted, trying to pull away from him, but Frank clung on, being dragged into the freezing cold with only boxers and a t-shirt on. "Gee, please! You know I don't want to be with you in that way" he lied, though his grip was slowly slipping. Gerard shook his head, and with a huge pull he got Frank off, but fell back onto his ass. Frank fell onto his shoulder, and let out a cry of pain. Looking across at his friend, he was getting up again, he shivered in the cold. "Please…Gerard…" he whispered, and Gerard gave him a tortured look. "I'm sorry… I have to go…" he said, and turned quickly, half-running as he went. Frank stared after his friend. He honestly couldn't believe he left, he thought Gerard would stay with him, tell him he loved him… Slowly, tears began to run down his face, and he collapsed on the floor, curling into a ball as he wept to himself, softly saying Gerard's name to himself.


	4. Chapter 4

It had been at least six days, and now Gerard's chest literally ached with the pain of leaving Frank. But he couldn't possibly stay, not then. It had been too confusing. One minute Frank was his best friend…then…that. Wincing to himself, he remembered the look on Frank's face as Gerard left him. It haunted his thoughts, torturing him as he walked, urging him to at least check he was okay. He probably was though, Gerard figured, knowing Frank never usually got this upset. He'd be able to handle it. But maybe he should just check… just in case. Trying to get his emotions in check, the dark-haired male cleared his throat, which was sore and dry from crying. He'd being doing a lot of that, but managed to stifle it lately. Now was the time for thinking, and getting things sorted, since crying it away hadn't worked. With a frown of determination, he pulled out his phone quickly. He took shelter from overhearing voices in an abandoned shops door shallow. It wasn't amazing, but he knew he'd lose the confidence to do this later, so it would have to do. Taking in a deep breath, he found his brothers number and placed the phone gently to his ear, keeping his breath held in. Holding a pillow tightly around his head, Mikey groaned to himself as his phone rang. No.. just leave me alone, he begged, but took the pillow away all the same. It hadn't helped anyway. He could still hear Frank crying in the next room, hear him sob in pain. Letting his eyes stray from the ceiling to his desk, he reached out with a long, heavy sigh to see whether it was worth answering. Glancing once at the phone, his eyes widened and his teeth gritted together. Mikey answered hastily, trying to keep his voice shallow so Frank wouldn't hear. "Gerard! Where the fuck are you!?" he hissed, and there was a long pause. Mikey wondered whether the phone had hung up, but Gerard spoke before he could check. "How's Frank?" he asked quietly, voice cracking slightly under his guilt. The younger brother grimaced, and stood from the bed with sudden energy, moving to his door. By the longer silence, Mikey knew he had heard Frank. His soft pleas to Gerard to return, followed by crying into his pillow. He really was, in a word, a mess. Returning to his room, he let Gerard have some time. He could tell by the rustle of fabric that Gerard was covering the phone to do something, which Mikey suspected was cry. Then, slowly, Gerard returned to the phone. "I-I'm sorry.. Mikey. Really, I am! Fuck…no, I didn't want for this to.. You know, I couldn't help it! What he said...did… I would have never thought that… before… in the snow, we'd said, it meant nothing!" he said frantically, getting worked up, not making any sense. Slowly, Mikey exhaled, closing his eyes gently. "What happened in the..snow?" he asked quietly, trying to keep Gerard calm but work out what exactly was going on. Immediately, he started blabbing again. "Well…nothing! Or at least, I though not… I mean, the bathroom too, but that wasn't really… Frank looked so normal, y'know?" he asked, and Mikey wished he did. Again they both paused, then Gerard spoke again. "I thought he wanted me as a friend, Mikey. I thought we were friends…" he was sobbing without trying to hide it now, and it was tearing through his brother as easily as the sharpest blade. "Gee.." he said softly, but Gerard wasn't finished. "I'll come back, I owe that much to Frank.. I can't put him through this. But I'm not staying. I'll tell Frank I forgive him…then… just for a while…I'll…" he trailed off, but Mikey got it. Gerard would come back only to assure Frank that he wasn't mad, then he would leave, again. And this time Mikey didn't think he would return so easily. Before Mikey could try and talk him out of it, the dial tone rang through his ears. He considered telling Frank the news that Gerard was returning, but decided against it. It would do good for Gerard to tell him everything on his own. Frank needed that much at least. Low shivers ran violently through his spine, but he was used to that now. It just gave a slightly more pitiful look. Not that he needed to look anymore so. In a large t-shirt and pair of boxers, wrapped around a thin sheet, mainly soaked in his own tears, he couldn't look much more pathetic. The faint lines of eyeliner were still visibly stained on his face, though he had drowned out all of his make-up. His hair stuck in odd angles as he did when he woke up, though it was showing signs of neglect now. But that was expected. Frank had done nothing but sleep, cry, and pleaded over the past six days. He hardly ate, and hadn't spoken a word to anyone else in the band, who were all going out of their way to snap him out of it. But he was beyond help from them. His thoughts were incoherent even to him, forced out of place with greif and confusion. He had just about grasped the fact that Gerard would completely turn his back on him. Frank hadn't expected the miracle of Gerard admitting his undying love for him too and…well, they lived happily ever after. Even Frank wasn't too naïve for that. But Frank had hoped…at least he would be a friend. Hold him as he cried, and insist it was okay, because they always stuck things out. But he hadn't. No, he had left Frank on his own, left him with no idea where Gerard was of when -if, he thought painfully- he would come back. That hurt a lot too; to realise that Gerard didn't care enough to come back, to even call. Frank didn't find him selfish, as he knew what he must be going through, he was just surprised at the other. After the years, he had figured he had some knowledge of his friend…but…he had been wrong about him all along. Letting another involuntary shudder run over his body, he tightened into a ball, crying again his already drenched covers as he griped them close to himself, knowing they were his only security now. Mikey hadn't bothered him when he entered into the living room, and neither had anyone else. Either they were out, or Mikey had told the not to interfere. Either way, he was glad. Gerard shivered gently, feeling immediately warmer inside as he shut the door behind him, eyes livid. Then he winced as he got closer to the hall, hearing Frank's small sniffles. With a few moments of hesitation, he moved to his friends door, eying the room with shock. Frank seemed to have wrecked most of it. Things were all over the floor, the stereo was smashed in a heap, and the desk was tipped over. Gerard shuddered, wondering if that had been an angry streak of Frank's. He certainly hoped he wasn't still feeling that way. Slowly, he made his way inside, stepping over various things to get to the bed. Figuring it was either Bob or Mikey trying to talk to him again, Frank kept quiet and pretended to sleep, making his breath shallower and concentrating on his own horrible thoughts. Gerard reached the bed and hesitated, waiting a few seconds to see if Frank was really asleep. He frowned lightly as he didn't seem aware he was there, and sighed gently. After a moment or two, building up much strength to do so, he reached out a hand, pressing it lightly to his friends ribs. He shivered gently, knowing as soon as he woke up he'd explain and then he'd never get a chance to be this close to his friend against. That hurt him, and his heart throbbed again. Taking his chance, he let his fingers trace up across the others side, then across his shoulder. Then he pulled away slightly, hesitating. Frank frowned deeply, completely confused. Who the hell was touching him? Slowly, his eyes slipped open, and out of the corner of his eye, he saw Gerard staring down at him, looking as hurt and dejected as Frank felt. Pausing, Frank tried to make sense of that. After a while, he came up with the only solution he could think of. He was dreaming. That was odd, he hadn't dreamt so nicely before. Still, that was the only explanation. Rolling onto his back, he smiled lightly. He probably shouldn't embrace the dream so well, as it was what started this in the first place, but he needed to be close to Gerard, even in his subconscious. Gerard watched his friend, frozen in place, wondering if he had only just woken up, or if he had felt him touching him. He really hoped not. That wouldn't help in explaining he really couldn't be close to him. Suddenly, confusion flickered across his features. Frank was…smiling. Gerard stared at him with wide eyes, and both said nothing for a while. Then Frank held his arms out wordlessly, gesturing for Gerard to come onto the bed, and hold him. Gerard's head spun. What? That wasn't supposed to happen! Staring in a little horror, Gerard shook his head. "F-frank, that's not…" he struggled, hearing how bad his voice sounded. Frank watched him, confused, letting his arms drop. Why did Gerard look so… bad? Surely if this was his dream then Gerard would look like perfection. Like he always did…except now… he looked all wrong. Like he had been crying for a long time. Again, both stared wordlessly, each as confused as the other. After another few minutes of both trying to find a solution, Gerard's expression softened. "Frank.." he whispered hoarsely, and his friend looked shocked by the look on his face. That one had been in his dream before. Frank stayed still a few seconds, before smiling lightly again, and holding his arms out to the other as he had before, wondering if he would accept or reject him again. This was a weird dream, but it was slowly getting better. Eyes on Frank's, Gerard hesitated yet again, looking torn. But his common sense was gone. All thoughts of leaving were pushed to the back of his mind. It would make Frank happy, and make him happy too. He wasn't sure what the hell was running through his friends mind, but right now he didn't care. Slowly, carefully, he slipped onto the bed with his friend, pulling his arms round Frank's smaller figure. Immediately, the smaller man pressed close to Gerard's chest, kissing his shirt lightly in an attempt to make himself closer to the other. Shivering, Gerard leaned down, lips pressing to his friends hair gently. Then they both rested, content in each others arms. When they were joined so perfectly, nothing but their own happiness mattered. Doubts flew away and pain was gone. For now, at least. They could be happy for now.


	5. Chapter 5

Slowly, Frank's eyelids fluttered open, his brown eyes hazy. He sighed heavily, pressing close to the other guy's chest. Wait… what other guy?! Frank's eyelids flew open again and he stared at the covered chest in front of him. His eyes widened. Oh God, had he done something really stupid? But…why would he? He didn't care for guys until his feelings for Gerard. His heart missed a beat. His memories slipped into place. His 'dream'. There was only one way to see if that was reality, though he didn't know which was better right now. His eyes trailed along the others shirt, across his neck and finally rested on his best friends face, half-covered in his messy black hair. Letting in a sharp gasp, Frank shivered. Gerard was here, and so was Frank. In the same bed, together. But, how had that happened? Letting his thoughts run wild again, he moved up slightly, putting his face more level with Gerard's, simply watching him as he slept. Occasionally he'd stir, and Frank would almost leap out of his skin from surprise, but for the most part he was peaceful. Eventually, he remembered each detail of his dream. He remembered what a fool he must have seemed, opening his arms to Gerard like that. It embarrassed him, but that bit didn't matter. There was only one part he focused on. Gerard had… accepted him. Frank had kissed his chest, and he had made no movement to stop him. His eyes drifted down to the others lips. Maybe he hadn't understood either? Maybe Frank had… caught him off guard? And…if so, could he catch him off guard again? Frank winced at his selfish thoughts, but knew deep down it was true. He'd do anything to have Gerard for himself. Gerard had accepted him, and he couldn't make excuses for that. Gerard would not leave him again, at least, not without a fight. Of course, Frank was deluding himself in thinking everything would good from now on, and Gee would have a relationship with him. It wouldn't be that simple, he knew that really, but it was nice to think Gerard wanted him for now, even if it might not be true. Through his thoughts, Frank hadn't realised how close they truly were. He could feel Gerard's warm breath on his lips as he took heavy breaths when he slept. Frank's legs were bended so he curled up to Gerard's chest, and Gerard had his arms round Franks back. Frank had probably been holding his friend before, too, but had moved too quickly to notice how. Slightly mesmerized by Gerard's lips, Frank got his breathing pattern to match Gerard's. It comforted him a little, though he wasn't sure why. For about another half an hour, Frank simply watched Gerard, content resting next to him as he slept. Then he studied his lips yet again, and his stomach turned slightly. No, he wouldn't push Gerard like that… what if he woke up? But he was asleep…and it would only be for a second… Still his stomach twisted, his doubts fighting uncomfortably with his urges. "Fuck it" he whispered to himself, pressing his lips urgently against Gerard's. Oh God, they felt so perfect. Frank's eyes widened, then fluttered closed, as he traced his friends bottom lip with his tongue. Then his tongue met Gerard's, and his heart raced. Quickly, he jerked his face away from the others, breathing heavily. He sighed deeply, knowing that he shouldn't have taken that risk. But at least Gerard didn't wa- Slowly, a smile slid across his friends face. Frank froze, eyes wide. Oh no. Gerard let his smile slip, but whispered gently, "Don't stop." Frank let his jaw drop, his cheeks flushing as he was caught in the act. Slowly, Gerard's eyes slipped open and he looked into his his friends. Frank's body tensed, and Gerard felt it underneath the arm that kept Frank close to him. Both males watched each other, unsure what to say. Both knew what they wanted, but couldn't quite build up the confidence. Again, Gerard looked a little pleading and whispered, "Please, don't stop." Frank bit his lip gently, before leaning slightly closer to Gerard. "But, are you su-" he was cut off as Gerard's lips crushed against his own. His kiss was much more passionate than before, and Frank was caught by surprise. His breathing hitched, and he gasped, though his lips still moved with his friends. But, were they friends anymore? Oh, did it matter? Frank grinned into the kiss. His kiss, with Gerard. He was finally kissing Gerard Way! Letting pleasure take over, Frank broke off only for a moment to climb on top of his friend and straddle his waist, then their lips locked again. Gerard blushed this time, knowing he couldn't stop Frank now. They were both too happy. He couldn't ruin this, could he? Wincing, he knew he had to. It had been his fault. He shouldn't have told Frank to kiss him again. They weren't meant to be doing this! Pulling his lips away roughly, he looked up at his friend, biting his bottom lip deeply. Rejection showed clearly on Frank's face after a few seconds, and he slipped off of Gerard carefully, sitting up next to him, looking away. Gerard felt guilt throb through him, and he sat up too, wrapping his arms round Frank from the back, hugging him gently. It took a moment for Frank to respond, but he eventually turned and sighed, only understanding on his face. Gerard looked away from him, cheeks still flushed. "Sorry…I-I can't do that now." he murmured, apologetic look crossing his face. Frank's expression softened and he wrapped his arms round Gerard's back, hugging him tightly. Gerard smiled softly, hugging his friend back, resting his cheek on Frank's shoulder. Slowly, Frank rocked back and forth, rubbing Gerard's back. A sign that it was okay, he understood. He would always understand for Gerard's sake, he had to. As Frank felt Gerard shiver in his arms, he pulled back slightly, seeing tears run down his friends face. He frowned lightly. "Gee? It's okay, I understand.. Please, don't cry" he whispered, his tears hurting. Gerard looked into his eyes and smile painfully. "No, I know. I'm just…" he paused, not knowing the right word. Frank waited, fingers still trailing across his back as he thought. "Scared" he said finally, eyes resting on his friends. Frank let out a low gasp, face crumpling. "Please, don't. I don't want to make you feel like that.." he winced before he continued. "You don't have to be…with me, if it makes you scared" he whispered, and was going to continue but Gerard placed a finger over his lips. Gerard shook his head, before looking down. "I think I've already made my decision on that" he said quietly, and Frank spoke even though Gerard still intended for him to be quiet. "And?" Gerard looked back up, eyes trailing across Frank. His best friend, the one who never let him down, even when he left him in despair. "I don't deserve someone like you" he said, his chest hurting, but not like it had when he left. This was a different pain. It covered not only his heart, but most of his chest, making his breathing uneven as it ached. Frank now looked angry, and he took his hand away from Gerard's back, grabbing his chin and forcing him to meet his eyes. "Dare say that, Gerard Arthur Way, and I swear I'll murder you." he growled, shaking his head. Gerard didn't back down, but simply let more tears fall down his face. "No more than I deserve. I shouldn't have left you like that. I shouldn't have been so annoyed at you for feeling that way. I was such an idiot." he finished, and Frank shook his head again furiously, bring up his other hand to cradle Gerard's face in both of them. "Gee, please. You're not being fair on yourself. You came back, you made me feel so happy. You were scared, and I can forgive you for that, because I was scared too at first. When I first knew how I felt, I could barely look at you. It was so difficult." he whispered, and pressed their lips together lightly, despite Gerard pulling away before. Gerard didn't argue, but didn't kiss him back. He still felt awful, though he was glad Frank had known what he was going through. Almost on the point of crying himself, Frank pulled back, sighing deeply. "You can leave me, leave this whole fucking town and never come back. But I won't let you live in that guilt. I won't let you!" he almost shouted, and Gerard shivered gently, doubt still obvious in his eyes. Gerard lifted his own arms to Frank's, and shook his head. "I can't promise that" he said, voice barely a whisper. Breathing heavily, Frank let his tears spill over, and his shoulders shook as he sobbed. "Gerard, please, I love you" he whispered, forcing himself to meet Gerard's eyes. Gerard's body froze, he looked at Frank curiously, feeling a bit dizzy. His hands dropped from Frank's, and Frank let Gerard's face ago as he tried to determine his expression. "Y-you what?" he asked, and Frank bit his lip. "Oh.. Gee, please, don't get all weird again, I didn't mean to say it like that." he blabbed on, trying to make sure Gerard didn't get all freaked out again. But his expression was smoothed over and Frank couldn't tell what was going through his mind. "I didn't mean it to be… well, I did, but you know. You said, and I could help it and… I know I shouldn't. You've not even said anything about that, what was I supposed to say? Gerard! Please!" he was getting himself worked up, and Gerard put a hand roughly over Frank's mouth to shut him up. Frank blushed deeply, watching his friend. Gerard narrowed his eyes as he studied Frank. "I'm sorry, Gerard" Frank murmured, though it was muffled, but Gerard still knew what he meant. "Don't be.." he said quietly, and paused. "I think… I love you too." he whispered, and Frank's eyes widened. More tears spilled over, happy ones. Gerard grinned widely, and pulled his hand away. Frank bashed into Gerard and hugged him so tightly that he could barely breathe, knocking him down to the bed. Gerard let out a gasp, not responding, but Frank didn't seem to notice, as he was too caught up in his own rejoice. Then, slowly, he pulled back and looked down at Gerard, he was blushing lightly. Frank frowned, then blushed himself as he felt their crotch's pressed together, hips grinding in the hug. Franks moved off Gerard, and he didn't object. That was a little too much, for now. Then they both simply sat, grinning moronically at each other, blushes still apparent on their faces. Then Gerard's face cleared of emotion, before slowly turning to shock. Uttering the most sensible thing any of them had said for a while, he let out, "Shit! The rest of the band…do they know? Of course they don't… But did Mikey see us asleep together?" he asked, his face, if possible, becoming more pale. Frank laughed, shrugging gently. "Dunno. Let's go ask!" he exclaimed enthusiastically and half-rolled off the bed. Gerard watched him, a smile sliding across his face. It wouldn't be that different as being friends with Frank. He was still a cute, demented, over-happy little freak. That's what he loved about him, and always had. He knew that now. Getting off the bed with Frank, he took his hand gently and Frank grinned, pulling a face. "We're not married yet, Gerard! I won't take this outrageous show of affection!" he said in a shrill, English woman's voice, before bring their hands to his face and licking the back of Gerard's hand. "I licked you." he pointed out, and Gerard laughed, moving Frank's hand to his own mouth. He ran his tongue up the others hand and grinned. "I licked you, too." They both laughed, and moved out of the room, glad things were better. They'd hardly talked at all, and they both knew they'd have to eventually, but for now they'd just be the two idiots they always were.


	6. Chapter 6

Huddled in a tight circle in the middle of the living room floor were Bob, Ray and Mikey. All were deep in thought. Bob rested his chin in his palms and bit his lip ring thoughtfully, whilst Ray playing with his hair, and Mikey watched both of them with a grin. Ray finally felt paranoid by Mikey's constant gaze and frowned. "What?" he asked simply, and Mikey shook his head. Bob was interested now. "What? You're hiding something." he pointed out and Mikey's grin widened. Sighing, he took a quick glance around them. "I was just wondering… who would be on top?" he asked, and laughed at how weird that sounded. Bob looked outraged, whereas Ray looked thoughtful. "Mikey! That's your brother, how can you think about that?" Bob asked, and Mikey shrugged. "I was just curious is all. Besides, you told me to tell you… it's not that weird. I mean, they're such a nice couple, aren't they?" he asked, and Bob didn't look convinced. "That's besides the point. I don't see how you can accept it so quickly." he murmured. "Frank," Ray said simply. Both men glanced at him, frowning. They waited, but Ray didn't continue. "Frank what?" Mikey asked, and Ray raised both eyebrows. "On top. I think Frank would be. I mean, I know Gerard's the obvious one, but Frank's the one who comforted him and everything wasn't he?" he asked, tucking his thick hair behind his ear. Most just fell back into place. Mikey shook his head, sitting up a little straighter. "I think Gee would be. I mean, he's a little… emotionally unstable, but he's always there for you, y'know. He's naturally dominant, even if he doesn't like to be. I should know, I grew up with him." he said, rubbing his bottom lip with his thumb as he crossed his legs over. Ray thought it over, then shook his head. "Nope, I still say Frank. It's different with him. Gee never did that sort of thing with Frank. Besides, it's totally different in a relationship, isn't it? Frank seems like…" Ray paused, and Mikey leaned closer. Bob still looked a little disturbed, but kept his mouth shut. "He knows what he's doing." he concluded, and Bob's face twisted into disgust, obvious bad pictures passing through his head. Mikey laughed at his expression and dug a hand into his back pocket. "Fine.. Twenty dollars says Gee." he said, waving the note about. Ray paused only for a moment, before holding his hand out. "Deal. But I don't think they'll tell us." They shook hands and Mikey frowned lightly. "Have they even…done it yet?" he asked and this time all three men took on the disgusted expression. "Okay. Moving on." Bob said firmly, sighing heavily and leaning back, resting his body weight on his arms. They lapsed into silence, glancing round at each other every once in a while. Then, suddenly, Ray asked the question buzzing in his mind. "Who would be.. bigger?" he asked, cheeks colouring slightly as Bob cringed and looked accusingly at him. "Oh no! I'm not having this discussion!" But Mikey was thoughrally interested. "Now that one's definitely Gerard." he said, but Ray shook his head immediately. "No, I think this one goes to Frank too…" he said, and Mikey raised both eyebrows, grinning perversely. "You seem very confident in Frankie. Anyone would think you had inside information, Ray." Ray's eyes widened. "Ew, no! I just mean… well, I know he's tiny and stuff. I mean his feet are so small… but, I've definitely seen something bigger…down there." he said, putting his face in his hands, trying to make the embarrassment lessen. Mikey even looked a little surprised now. "You've seen?" he asked, and Ray frowned yet again, covering more of his face. "Of course not, but you know when he wakes up, he always walks round in his boxers." he muttered in his defence. Again, they were silent. "Okay" Mikey exclaimed, getting to his feet. "Another twenty says Gerard has a bigger thing than Frank!" He grinned down at them, then frowned as he saw their horrified expressions. Bob looked about ready to curl into a ball and it clicked. Slowly, Mikey turned his head to see Gerard and Frank, staring wide-eyed at him. Only Frank was blushing. Mainly because he was being bet against. Then Mikey drew in a sharp breath. "Oh, hi… I was talking about…someone else.." he paused, watching as a grin spread across Gerard's face. "How many bets have you made?" he asked, and Frank looked up at him, frowning. He didn't want to know. Mikey sank back down to the floor. "Two" he said honestly, then looked accusingly at the other two for not warning him. "What was the other one?" he asked, moving into the room. Frank rolled his eyes. "Please, can we not do this?" he asked, but Gerard wouldn't listen to him. Frank stood awkwardly as Gerard sat down, pushing Mikey over slightly. Bob, Ray and Mikey looked at each other with guilty expressions. Then Bob sighed. "They were betting on who would… be on top" he said, emphasizing the fact he had nothing to do with it. Now it was out of the way, Mikey and Ray were curious to hear the answer, and watched Gerard expectantly. Taking a glance at Frank, who watched him with desperate eyes, feeling completely insecure. "Oh, okay. Well you'll never find out if you don't leave us alone for a while." he pointed out, making Frank's cheeks turn crimson. Bob stood first, crinkling his nose in distaste as he left silently. Ray and Mikey rose reluctantly, then Mikey paused. "You've not… yet?" he asked, not thinking he needed to elaborate. Gerard stood up too, moving back to Frank. "It's not like that." he frowned lightly, seeming a bit annoyed now. Mikey's eyes widened. "Oh no, I wasn't trying to accuse you of that." he assured, and Gerard relaxed. "No, I know." he said, though his voice demanded that they stopped discussing it now. Frank smoothed down his shirt, seeming to find it hard to keep still through his and Ray left quickly, leaving Gerard to gaze after them, making sure they were fully alone. Then he turned to Frank, who still looked uncomfortable. Frank glared at him. Gerard took a step back. "What?" he asked. The shorter male stepped forwards. "You know perfectly well! I don't want to talk about those things with them.. Your brother." he looked down, letting his hair fall over his face. Gerard looked surprised, and moved closer to Frank, putting a hand under his chin and lifting it so he could look at him properly. "I didn't know that bothered you so much." he admitted, keeping Frank's gaze. Simply shaking his head, Frank pushed away Gerard's hand and moved to the couch quickly, slumping down on it with a sigh. Looking across at his friend, Gerard bit his lip. "Look, I'm sorry. I didn't think you worried about that stuff. I shouldn't have said anything." he said quickly, moving around the side of the couch, tilting his head to look at Frank. Trying to block him out, Frank let his eyes close. "Yeah, okay. It's fine" he said simply, sighing as he lay down properly, keeping his eyes closed. Gerard pursed his lips. It was fine if Frank was angry with him, but he didn't like being ignored at all. As quietly as he could, without disturbing Frank, he slipped onto the couch, steadying himself as he moved on top of Frank. He almost fell straight off at one point, but eventually managed to clasp Frank in a no contact straddle. Wondering why Gerard was so quiet, Frank's eyes flashed open. Gerard grinned down at him, and Frank nearly fell off himself, letting out a cry. "Gerard!" he screamed, trying to push him away. It didn't work, Gerard was too well positioned. "No! You're ignoring me." he said quietly, and Frank sighed, not trying anymore but simply resting his head back. "Yes. I'm annoyed, and not just at you. They shouldn't be betting on us." he said, eyebrows knotted together in irritation. Leaning closer to Frank, who was finding it exceedingly difficult to resist Gerard now, he nodded lightly. "I know. I don't suppose we can stop them, though." he murmured, and as Frank opened his mouth to speak, Gerard pressed his own lips against the smaller males. Frank's eyes widened, but he couldn't force himself to push Gerard away. Slowly, Frank accepted the kiss, and pulled his arms around Gerard's neck. He was going to tell him off for doing it, but it was making him feel a whole lot better. Gerard smiled lightly, lifting them up into a sitting position by pulling his arms tightly round Frank's back. Now finding it easier to move, Frank pulled away from the kiss, which disappointed Gerard, but pressed closer, hugging Gerard tightly. "You're so annoying sometimes." Frank murmured into his ear, and Gerard shivered. "Well, you're annoying most of the time, so I think you can let me off." he whispered back, kissing along the others collar bone, which caused Frank to gasp and press his hips closer to the others. "No, I won't let you off" His voice shook as he spoke, due to Gerard continuous lips across his neck. Gerard chuckled. "Really? Do I have to stop?" he asked, kissing Frank's jaw line a couple of times before leaning back. Frank was trembling, and his eyes widened. He shook his head timidly. "I forgive you." he whispered desperately, and Gerard kissed his forehead gently. "I know. But we really shouldn't do that now." he said seriously. Despite the lust that clawed at him, Frank nodded. "Yeah, okay." It had only been about a week since Frank and Gerard had first told Mikey that they were together, which had gone reasonably well, but now the lustful tension between them while they were together was getting much worse. They knew it was just a matter of time now. Frank held Gerard close to him, sighing quietly. He relaxed in Gerard's arms and closed his eyes again. "I love you, Gee." he whispered. Gerard gave him a squeeze before resting his back on the couch and closing his own eyes. "I know." he assured him, and Frank smiled lightly. "Do you love me?" he asked, moving his head down to Gerard's chest, pressing his cheek gently to his shirt. He listened to the soft beat of Gerard's heart. "With all my heart." he replied, looking down at Frank. Sometimes he wondered if the situation had gone differently, whether they would still have gotten together. But things like that were inevitable. They just.. Needed to happen. Gerard knew that now. A smile slipped onto Franks face, and he kept silent now, just listening to Gerard's pulse. It soothed him, though he wasn't sure why. Just knowing he was this close was comforting enough. Eventually, after around three quarters of an hour of silence, Gerard let out a yawn. Frank let his eyes open and looked up at Gerard, worried. "I'm sorry. I'm being boring, aren't I?" he asked, leaning away from the others chest. Gerard grinned, pressing Frank closer quickly. "No, this is nice, I'm just really sleepy." he explained, running his fingers up Frank's spine, making him shiver. Gerard kept his fingers moving until he reached the smaller male's array of messy dark hair. He tangled the strands through his fingers, and Frank smiled lightly, snuggling back into his chest. "Then sleep. I don't mind." he whispered. "I'm pretty tired, too." Gerard continued to play with Frank's hair, but nodded gently. "Thanks" he murmured quietly. Eventually, his hand slipped down to Frank's back and his breathing became shallower as he slept. Frank fell asleep not long after, to the drum of Gerard's heart. After successfully walking into a wall after waking up, then tripping in the hall, Mikey Way was not in the best of moods. He groaned groggily as he wandered to the living room, trying to get to the kitchen for something, anything, to eat. "Hey guys, when-" he stopped shouting, breathing hitching as he glanced at the couch, and his sleeping friend and brother. His expression softened. Frank was sprawled across Gerard's chest, and both had smiles across their resting faces. It was adorable to say the least. They just looked so damn happy. Moving closer to the couch, he sighed gently. He almost felt guilty thinking about their conversation the night before. Gerard was probably right to accuse him. It definitely wasn't like that. Suddenly, Frank let out a groan and his eyes opened quickly. His eyes scanned the room until they rested on Mikey. "Oh!" he gasped, sitting up and pulling away from Gerard. "Sorry.." he said quickly, biting his bottom lip whilst looking down at the still sleeping Gerard. Mikey backed up a little. "Oh, no.. it's fine. I have to get used to those things anyway. Besides.." he looked away, and started to move out of the room. "You're so cute together." he murmured quietly, moving to the adjoined kitchen. Frank smiled warmly, jumping lightly as he felt Gerard stir. His eyes slipped down to his previous sleeping partner as his eyes opened too. He frowned lightly. "Oh, I did fall asleep.." he said quietly, then looked across at Frank. That was why he felt so empty, since Frank had moved away. He grinned, then caught sight of Mikey. "Oh, hey. Sorry. I didn't mean to sleep for so long." he said, sitting up fully, crossing his legs in front of him. Frank moved slightly closer to him, pressing their shoulders together. Mikey hardly paid attention to them now, but dragged out several packets of pancake mix and a frying pan. "It's okay. Just a surprise in the morning, you know." he said, then frowned. "Do you two want pancakes too?" he asked, then lifted his head as he heard Either Ray or Bob stir and wake. He sighed, knowing he'd have to make more now. Gerard shook his head, not used to eating in the morning. "No, thanks. Just coffee." He rose quickly, causing Frank to fall to the side, letting out a cry. Gerard spun quickly, looking down at him. Frank frowned, pulling himself up and standing next to Gerard. "Yeah, me neither. Need to create, y'know." he shrugged. Neither brother had any idea what he was on about, but both nodded like they did. Gerard wandered into the kitchen with his brother whilst Frank pulled off his jeans as he got to his room. It felt more comfortable in the mornings, since no-one was around him now. Taking Pansy quickly into his hands, and moved straight to his bed, sitting and pressing his back against the wall. After Gerard had made his coffee and taken most of it in three long gulps, he dragged his feet along as he moved to his own room. Though, he hadn't been using it much anymore, since he preferred to be closer to Frank when he slept. On his way, he paused outside Frank's room, hearing him playing. It wasn't unusual. He'd heard him play loads of times. It just made him stop this time. He didn't recognise the song. Clutching his cup tightly in his hands, he slumped down to the floor, pressing his ear to his friends door. Keeping his eyes on the fret board, Frank bit his lip as he played. He was mainly making up as he went along. It sounded crap to start with, but it was slowly starting to flow. Well, just about. Then, slowly, he sighed. His fingers stopped, and he rested his guitar down, leaning against the bed. Not for the first time, he wondered what the hell he was doing. It was his fault that they were together. Not that he was ashamed. He loved Gerard, and knew he loved him too. It just made him feel a little guilty. In all honesty he had no idea how their relationship would progress, if it would at all. He could never tell anyone in his family. They wouldn't say anything, but they definitely wouldn't be happy. Letting out a long sigh, his eyes strayed to the door. He wanted to tell Gerard his feelings, but knew he'd wuss out. He hated having to tell him he had problems. It made him feel like such a nuisance, which he knew he was already. As the playing stopped, Gerard frowned, wanting to tell him to carry on. He had been enjoying that. It was less upbeat than Frank was used to, though still at the same tempo. Resting his cup down, he rose to his feet and entered Frank's room without so much as a knock. Frank looked up quickly, immediately bringing his legs up to his chest to hide his not fully adorned lower half. It didn't help much, really. Gerard looked across at him, and Frank relaxed slightly, but still felt self-conscious. "Hey." Frank said simply, and Gerard nodded off his greeting, moving to the bed with him. "What were you playing?" he asked, and Frank looked down at his beloved rhythm guitar. "Oh.. Just, something new. Told you I was creating." he grabbed Pansy again, cradling it in his arms, rather than playing. Gerard looked across him, watching as he lowered his knees. "Can you play it again? I really liked it." Frank looked a little surprised, but nodded gently. Putting his legs down fully, he sighed gently and began to play. It took a few minutes of playing top get properly into the song again, but Gerard didn't seem to mind, and kept silent as he played. His expression was so smooth that Frank couldn't tell whether he liked it or not, though he assumed he did since he had liked it before. Slowly starting to feel more self-conscious, Frank brought it to a close and pushed his guitar away quickly to show he was done now. Gerard stayed silent, studying Frank. Frank looked away, leaning against the wall. "Was it okay?" he asked after a long pause, impatient. Gerard moved closer to him and kissed his lips lightly. "Yes, I loved it. Not you're usual style, though." he whispered. Frank shrugged lightly, flattened against the wall due to Gerard's closeness. "I felt time for a change." he said simply. Gerard didn't bother to ask what he meant by that, as he felt it had further meaning, but just moved away from him. "We all need a change sometimes." he smiled pleasantly, getting off the bed. "Get ready soon, though, okay? We're going out." he left quickly, not giving Frank chance to ask where they were going, or what 'We're' meant. All of them, or just the two of them? Staring after Gerard, he seemed confused why the older male had been so brief on his criticism. Usually he told Frank exactly what he was thinking, but now Frank was sure he felt more about it. But, he wouldn't dwell on that for now. Far bigger things wandered across his mind.


	7. Chapter 7

Finally tearing himself away from Gerard, who had fallen asleep quicker than he had hoped, Frank moved to get himself something to eat. The day had been nice. Gerard was taken him into town and they had gone an bought comics just like they used to before. Then he took Frank to the Ferris wheel and managed to coax him on so they could get right to the top. Even Frank wasn't sure about the significance of being up there, kissing Gerard like that. On ground, or in the sky, did it matter? He was still living out his dreams, and living his life with Gee. But it had been…magical. The sheer view, and the way Gerard looked at him with adoration. He had felt so perfect inside, just for that time. Just when he was that close to Gerard, it was like they would never face any other problems. But of course, that had faded quickly and Frank was back to his agonising doubts. He had tried to talk to Gerard, but had been silenced with a kiss for babbling. By then he had been too light-headed to carry on. Frank knew that he couldn't bottle it up for much longer. It was eating at him slowly, but how would Gerard take it? He seemed so.. Care-free. Frank admired him for that, though it made him wonder what ran through his boyfriend's (he still grinned moronically every time he thought the word) mind. Letting his eyes wander to the living room as he dragged his feet, he spotted Bob on the sofa and suddenly felt a little awkward. He knew Bob had been the least accepting of their relationship so far. Frank wondered whether he should talk to him, and hesitated. He was bad with talks like that. Still, Bob was sensible enough, and Frank had a right to know what was so wrong… Bob spared only a glance to Frank as he grabbed an apple and made his way to the sofa too. Pulling his legs up on the seat, Frank took a bite out of the fruit, gazing intently at Bob. The taller male turned to Frank, and raised one eyebrow. Frank frowned lightly, eying him accusingly."You don't like me being with Gerard." he murmured simply and Bob stayed silent for a little while, biting into his lip ring. "It's not that-""Then what is it?" Frank asked, wondering what could possibly be wrong with them being together. "Is it that we're…" he paused, crinkling his nose. "Gay?" he asked, barely getting the word out without laughing. His eyes widened, and he shook his head quickly. "No! No, it's nothing like that. I'm happy for you two, I am.. I just…"Frank waited, not seeming satisfied with the dragging silence. "I just.. Don't think you've thought it over is all. I mean, it's all good that you're together and…love each other and everything.. But, have you asked yourselves, and each other, the important questions?" he asked, though knew he wasn't making a lot of 's eyes narrowed. "What kind of important questions?" he asked with struggled again, pausing. "Well… tons. I mean, the future mainly. Where is your relationship going? Are you going to live together, get married? What? I mean, I know you're happy now…but it all seems too spontaneous." he finished, though it was obvious he wanted to say more. Frank stared at him for a while, face contorting in understanding but grief at the same time. "Yeah…okay.." he murmured. Bob had just pulled the questions out of his brain. "I'm sorry, Frank. I really am happy for you. It's just… you can't build a relationship, if that's what you want, on… lust, or whatever it is." he said, and widened his eyes as Frank glared at him. "For your information, we haven't… well, you know, yet." he said indignantly. "Oh, no, Frank. You got me wrong, I wasn't trying to say tha-""Good, don't. Everyone seems to think it's that. It's not. I really.." he trailed off, and pulled his legs up to his chest, covering his face with his hands. Bob got up without thinking, moving over to him and putting a hand on his back. "Frank… I'm sorry." "No! No, you can't be sorry, because it's all true, isn't it? I don't know what Gerard wants. Hell, I don't even know what I want! It's fucked up, I know. I don't have a plan for the future, or anything like that." he shivered, sobbing into his hands. Rubbing his friend back lightly, Bob moved closer to him. "Shit, no, I am sorry. I didn't mean to intrude." He choked, feeling guilty for making Frank feel this way. "Besides, it's not like that stuff matters for now… I just needed to know that you were at least thinking about the future a litt-""But we're not! I tried to speak to Gee but… I got distracted." he sighed into his hands, pulling them away quickly. He was more under control now, though tears still streamed silently across his cheeks. "I don't even know what he's thinking… does he feel the same, or is he not bothered? I really don't know.." he whispered, causing Bob to strain to hear him. "Well… maybe you should try to talk to him more. I'm sure he'll understand. He's a sensitive guy, just a bit blind at the moment." he murmured, and Frank smiled lightly. "Love is blind." He quoted quietly, causing Bob to smile back. "More like deaf and dumb, but you get the picture, yeah." Frank paused, smile slipping away as he thought. Bob let him, not interrupting his troubled thoughts for fear of making him cry again. "Maybe Gerard just… doesn't want those things." he muttered, resting his chin on his knee tops. Bob eyed him curiously, and Frank looked across at him. "I mean, I know I want to… well, I wouldn't go so far as marriage and stuff, but I definitely want a proper relationship with Gee… but… maybe he's not ready for that." Understanding flickered across the others face and Bob shook his head quickly. "I honestly don't think it's that Frank. I just don't think Gerard's thought it all ov-" "No, I think I'm right. He never even officially said we're together, though I suppose that's obvious." Frank went over his thoughts, another painful one coming to mind. Maybe Gerard didn't love him as much as he thought… He frowned deeply, not voicing that one, though it lingered strongly. "Seriously, Gerard isn't like that. He may seem all upfront, but if he has really strong feelings, he doesn't tend to announce them. Maybe he likes to keep that stuff to himself." "But that means he won't tell me." Frank replied, an unreadable expression on his face. Somewhere between confusion and pain. "Well, that comes in time, doesn't it?""What? He'll love me more in a year than now? Love me enough to tell me what's on his mind? I don't think so Bob.""No, I don't mean that. I just mean it's hard for Gerard to-""Y'know, it doesn't matter. I'll talk to him later, get it all sorted out for the best. Okay?"Bob paused, looking defeated. "Alright. Just don't get worked up about it. I know I said that before, but it's just my perspective, remember that." "Right, yours. Okay." Frank shook him off quickly, getting up quickly and throwing his apple into the trash, heading to Gerard's unoccupied room to think since the other was sleeping in his own. Throwing himself across the bed, he curled up in the sheets, resting his head lightly on Gerard's pillow. It all made much more sense now. Maybe Gerard simply.. Didn't feel the same way Frank did. He knew that he was probably overreacting in thinking that Gerard didn't want to be with him at all, because he had made it obvious he did, but he still felt his own feelings were much stronger. After all, Gerard never seemed eager to talk it over properly and they'd hardly made plans. Frank was barely sure Gerard would refer to Frank as his boyfriend rather than simply best friend. He doubted it, somehow. Groaning lightly, he put a hand over his head and looked up at the ceiling. He'd have to settle it all out. It was fine that Gerard felt that way. Frank wouldn't force him into a relationship he didn't want. He'd just break loose. In fact, it was probably better now than later when Frank's heart would break even worse. But, for now he figured he could smile and bear the pain. Pulling his hand down to his mouth, he bit deeply into his knuckle, closing his eyes to try and stop the tears flowing. It shouldn't be that hard to think about it. If he cried now, he wouldn't be able to keep a straight face when it came to the real thing. He just had to plan it out properly. Maybe he could do it a different way… a note. That would work. Frank would only have to see Gerard after the damage was done, and by then he would have sorted himself out enough. But he had to do it soon, otherwise he knew he would keep holding it off until he finally decided not to. Reminding himself that Gerard would know this was for the best, he got up unsteadily and moved to Gerard's desk, looking across his unfinished lyrics for a spare piece of paper. His eyes caught a piece that had been violently crossed out several times. He leaned his elbows up on the table, leaning back slightly so his tears didn't spoil Gerard's work. His eyes were too blurry to make out the lyrics properly, and he gave up quickly, not thinking it mattered much. With a pen in his shaking hand, he bit down hard on his bottom lip and wrote out the note.'I'm sorry Gerard. I know I never thought I'd do this. Even when we were young and stupid, I always thought "I'll never let him down, he doesn't deserve it". But I have to, don't I? I know you don't feel enough. And it's okay. I swear. We'll both be okay after it's over. Back to the same, I hope. If you can even have that. I won't make it weird for you, I promise. I'll stay, or go. Whatever makes you happier. I hope you won't be mad at .'He put the pen down quickly, eyes scanning to note. A few tears had scattered the page, and he frowned deeply, wondering whether he would notice. After a few minutes of reading it over and over, he picked the pen back up and scribbled out 'Love you' before setting it back down and folding the paper untidily, writing 'Gerard' on the front and stumbling out of the chair, heading out of the room with the paper scrunched up slightly in his hand. Trembling but determined, he slipped the note underneath the door, running back to Gerard's room to prevent himself pulling it back again. Only a few hours after falling asleep, Gerard woke silently, scorning himself for falling asleep when he was supposed to be spending time with Frank. Not that he thought he'd mind anyway. Sitting up, he rubbed his forehead slightly, and swung his legs over the side of the bed. Supposing he'd better apologise to Frank, he stood and moved to the door, eyes trailing along the floor. He stopped quickly, frowning down at the piece of paper. Was he disorientated? He had just woken up after all. Blinking a few times, he leaned down and scanned the front of the paper. No, it definitely did say his name on it. Moving back to the bed, he sat back down to read it. Flicking it open, his eyes scanned across the page. At first, only confusion showed on his face, as he had no idea what it was supposed to mean. Then his features turned to one of grief, and his fists tightened around the paper. If possible, he grew paler, as he read Frank's name with a sick churn of his stomach. No, that couldn't be right. Frank wouldn't… Just earlier that day he had said how much he loved him… Still not absorbing what was happening, he read it over again, then one more time. Each time, his expression deepened, until tears were building up. Letting out something between a cry and a moan, he ripped the note up, chucking it on the floor. He got up quickly, making his way to the door with haste."F-Frank!" he shouted, needing to get to the bottom of this. To understand why. Around a few minutes later, after Gerard had called several times, Frank appeared out of Gerard's room. He looked just as pale as the other, but was managing to keep his emotions in check well for now. Gerard spun round, eyes narrowing on Frank. "W-w..what was that about?" he asked, not needing to elaborate for Frank to know what he was talking about. For a while, Frank said nothing, which made Gerard even more anxious, but Frank was simply assuring that his voice wouldn't break from emotion. "It's over." he said quietly. "It's for the best." Gerard watched him with wide eyes, examining his expression, trying to take it in. He'd actually said it. In a way, Gerard had hoped it was a sick joke. But it wasn't… Frank was actually breaking up with him. "For the best?" Gerard repeated and Frank nodded solemnly. "Oh…" It was all he could manage right now. His head spun from confusion, but he couldn't bring himself to ask why. Frank waited, not sure if he should leave. He wanted to. There were a lot of things he wanted to do right now, but couldn't do any of them. It wasn't about what he wanted now, even if why Gerard was taking it so bad was confusing him. "But... don't you... l-love me?" Gerard mumbled, still utterly befuddled. Pain appeared on Frank's face, but he erased it quickly and avoided meeting Gerard's powerful gaze on him. "Gerard.. It's not about that-""Then what is it about?" he said, louder now, more forceful."Well… you know. Bob was- No.. We just don't want the same things. I don't want the same as you." He stuttered, voice breaking slightly at the end. Gerard's eyes widened and he shivered slightly. "Oh, I didn't know it was like that… I-I guess... if that's…for the best." He ended. He couldn't believe Frank actually…didn't want all of that. Didn't Frank want to be with him like he had said? Didn't he want a relationship like Gerard did? Gerard looked hurt, but accepted he could face that if Frank was really that set on it. Frank looked back at Gerard, looking into the others eyes for a second. Finally, he couldn't help it, and tears flowed silently across his cheeks as they did with Gerard. He just couldn't believe he had actually accepted it. So it was all true. Gerard didn't want a future, didn't want to be with Frank. Maybe… maybe it had just been lust like everyone thought, for Gerard at least. Before either of them could say anything more, Frank nodded gently and moved to his own room, shutting the door quietly behind him. An obvious sign that Gerard was no longer welcome there. For a long while, Gerard simply stood there, knees shaking, threatening to give way. It felt worse than before, when he had seen Frank like that… that hadn't been like this. This was complete loss. What would he do? Frank was what he had always known. Whether Frank was his best friend or boyfriend, he'd always been there. But now… how could they be anything? Gerard's heart had broken in two from the moment Frank had said it aloud. 'It's over. It's for the best.' The words tortured him and he let out a small pained moan, heading to the living room instead of his own. He needed to go out…somewhere. Anywhere, just away if only for the night. Grabbing his jacket quickly, along with his wallet, he scribbled a quick note messily. 'Out. Don't freak in the morning.G.'With that, he stepped out into the warm breeze, slamming the door shut behind him and heading out into the late afternoon to find some sort of diversion.


	8. Chapter 8

Despite his bawling and brooding when Gerard had left the first time, Frank had completely changed this time over. The pain was there, searing through him, but his outside layer stayed numb. He found he could put on a straight face and get through what he had done. Only because he knew Gerard had accepted it too. Frank had barely even given a care to his ex-boyfriend's first confusion. Though he still wondered a little why Gerard hadn't seen what was wrong. The note had said enough, Frank had thought. Still, maybe Gerard thought Frank wouldn't notice that he wanted nothing like that. Maybe he would have left him hanging… The other band members had noticed his numbing too. It was pretty obvious. Frank just… wasn't Frank anymore. He didn't speak, didn't react.. He just stayed silent and thought. He had sat in front of the television, but Mikey had checked on him. His eyes were completely unfocused, and he was murmuring things under his breath. It was like living with… well, a zombie. A living body with no soul. Not only was it deeply disturbing, but upsetting for the band. Bob especially. Completely off-character for him, he had cried. Mikey had never seen him do it before, but he had, trying to choke out he was sorry but not quite managing. Afterwards he had told Frank he was sorry properly, and Frank had simply told him it wasn't his fault. But his voice had been so bleak, it was hard to tell whether he meant it or not. With a small cry of pain, Gerard's back smashed against the wall. He briefly wondered how he got there, then opened his eyes, gazing across the well-lit but still dreary alley. He frowned, looking up. Oh, there was the sun. Was it morning? Had he slept? He grinned. It didn't matter anyway. Only a few moments later, he realized his hand was hurting really badly. It stung like crazy. Gerard looked down at his blood-covered hand, lifting it to shake off the flowing liquid. Fragments of glass were still in his wound. His eyes trailed across the injury, and his smile faded. Glancing down, he saw the smashed vodka bottle at the side of his thigh (he therefore noticed he had either fallen or sat down on his own will). "Aw, shit.." he slurred, quite obviously intoxicated. Of course, he was complaining over his broken bottle rather than his bloody hand. Slowly he stood, causing his head to spin uncomfortably. He automatically put a hand to it, getting blood over his hair. He felt it's warmth seep through to his scalp and pulled it away quickly. He leaned back against the wall, resting on the balls of his feet. He stayed there a while, trying to remember. He wasn't as drunk as he felt, and that was good. Well, not his definition of good right now, as he slowly started to remember. "Oh.." He managed, realizing what Frank had done to him. He frowned, wondering if he had dreamed that, because Frank wouldn't do that to him… Again, he felt his head spin. As things slipped into place, he finally realized why he was out. He remembered the note he left saying he would be back about now. He groaned, not wanting them to see him. Well, that one was easy, even to his drunken mind. He'd call them and say he was okay. Which he wasn't. Then he'd say he'd be gone for longer. After Gerard had sorted himself out he would go back and… The male winced into the light, finding his mental block irritating. He'd… what? What would he do? Letting out a short breath, he thought again. So, Frank had broke up with him… So he had left.. Suddenly, he let out a gasp, putting his bloody hand over his mouth, biting down on the wound to stop himself crying out with agony. Frank had left him and… had he even asked why? Yes… no, he must have asked that. Suddenly, he felt too drained to wonder the reply. He slumped back down to the floor, feeling the glass dig into his side. It didn't matter. That pain was minor. Having enough sense to do so, he used his good hand to pull out his phone and quickly looked down his line of numbers. He should call Mikey. Mikey would tell him what to do. He shivered gently, seeing Frank's name. If he just called for a minute, just to tell Frank… Again, a mental block came. Like a brick wall, stopping the answer from getting to him. It was infuriating. Sighing heavily, angrily, he pressed down on enter and put the phone to his ear, only noticing he was balling up his injured hand when it began to burn with pain. Breaking out of his thoughts was probably the best thing that could happen now. He'd already been there for roughly two hours, mind wandering. He wasn't even sure if he'd accomplished anything, but his phone still annoyed him to no end. How could someone call him now? He was trying to think. Swiping it from his side table, he let out a short breath, bringing it to his ear as he answered. "Hello?" he asked. His voice sounded bored, uninterested. Dull. Gerard stayed silent a moment, wondering what was wrong with his voice. Was it the phone? He knew it was Frank on the other end, but.. He sounded weird. "Frank? Is that you?" he asked, seeming genuinely curious. Almost dropping the phone in his shock, his eyes widened. He swallowed quickly. This was probably the most emotion he'd showed since last night. "Gerard?" He paused only slightly. "Why are you calling me?" he demanded, though his tone wasn't rough, just burning with desire for an answer. That one took a bit of thought, and Gerard paused for a few moments, looking down at his blood-stained hand. "I dunno. Did you break up with me?" he asked, his tone light and bizarre. Frank frowned deeply, hand tightening around the phone. For a moment he wondered if he had. If Gerard didn't remember, then maybe it never happened… "Yes… Gerard, what's wrong? Did you bang your head or something?" he asked, standing up and walking across his room, made Gerard upset again. He felt tears welling up but ignored them, still gazing at his hand. "No. I cut my hand pretty bad though… I don't think it needs stitches. Do you think I should go to the hospital anyway?" he asked, as if having a perfectly civil conversation. Now Frank was utterly confused. How had he cut his hand? Where the hell was he? But mainly, what the fuck was wrong with him?"Seriously, Gee. Have you…taken something?""What? Like stole? I wouldn't do that."Frank stopped walking, something finally clicking. "You've been drinking." He said simply, something between guilt and despair washing over him. "Oh, yeah… but it broke." Gerard answered, frowning again at the bottle, crying but not remembering what made him upset. "It broke.. Okay. Gerard, I'm gonna come and find you, okay? Do you know where you are?" He asked gently, though he was scared as fuck. Of course he knew Gerard was big enough to take care of himself, but he'd already been cut somehow and it might be more serious than… No. Of course that wasn't the reason. He just wanted an excuse to see Gerard. To help him. Plus excruciating guilt probed him. Was it his fault Gerard had drunk? Gerard looked around, squinting slightly. He leaned forwards and check the faded sign on the wall. "I think it says… London Road" he paused, shaking his head lightly. "I don't want to see you." he added, a bit confused, but knowing he was upset at the other and crying. Frank felt his heart ache and clutched his chest gently, eyes filling with tears. "Sorry, Gerard. I have to find you. I won't expect anything, though." Gerard moaned, shaking his head more violently and moving his head down to the floor so he was lying on his side. "Don't. I don't want to see you." he emphasized, causing Frank to let out a small noise of pain. Gerard didn't notice the pain he was causing. He was too wound up in his own clouded and odd thoughts. "Gerard, please-""No. Leave me alone.." he let out another moan of irritation, trying to wipe off the blood from his hand as it was stinging him badly now. That didn't help, it just made it worse. Frank shivered, knees threatening to give way. "I'm sorry… I don't understand why you're.." his voice broke and he stopped talking for a moment. "I-I'm sorry. I'm coming…bye." he shut off the phone. He couldn't handle anymore. He was almost gasping for breath from the pain to his chest. It was like suffocation. Who cares if Gerard was confused and drunk. He'd still said it. 'I don't want to see you. Leave me alone.' Frank began to get changed, the throbbing in his chest making his double over every now and the dial tone rang through his ear, Gerard closed his eyes gently. He simply put the phone down next to him, curling his legs up slightly to his chest, just wanting to sleep.


	9. Chapter 9

**It hadn't taken long for him to stuff some clothes on, and head out. He'd been held up a bit by Mikey's frantic questions. In all honestly, Mikey was just glad Frank was actually doing something, even if he wasn't sure what it was. Frank hadn't really listened to him, just insisted he had to go quickly. That had worried Mikey and he had tried to stop Frank, thinking he was leaving because of Gerard. In this situation, he had to be angry at his brother for being so irresponsible. He knew Frank was unstable like that. "No Mikey. I have to go! Let me past!" He'd insisted, and simply shoved him out of the way when he denied. Mikey tried to follow him, but Frank ran as fast as he could to get away. Now he wandered, not quite sure where he was. Whilst touring, everywhere was new and they rarely had time to look around properly, with only playing a few shows in each place. All he had was a supposed street name. Gerard could still be bleeding. He could have hurt himself even more, and Frank was stuck wandering. He felt himself getting more annoyed and angry. He'd been out for around two hours, simply searching. By now, Frank was considering trying to ring Gerard again. Sighing dejectedly, he brought out his phone, still walking. He thought Gerard would have enough sense to tell him exactly where he was now. Phoning him quickly, Frank walked as he waited. Then, suddenly, he stopped walking, eyes wide. Not far from where he was, he heard the familiar ring of Gerard's phone. Oh God, he thought, noticing how shady this place was. Mainly alleys and clubs. Not many were open, since it was only six, but it was already getting dark. Much to Gerard's irritation, his hazy but pleasant dream was interrupted. With a few unfriendly curses, his eyes slid open to reveal the dirty floor in front of him. He shivered violently, the cold getting to him now he was fully conscious. Then he noticed the object of his annoyance. His phone. Oh. Slowly, he reached out his hand and clasped it, but dropped it immediately after. "Fuck, ow!" he glanced at his stained red and brown hand. He felt a little sick. It looked nasty, and infected. What the fuck had he done? Heart beat accelerating, he tried to push himself up from his lying position with his good hand. He winced in pain, feeling the shards of glass in his hips and backside. By now, he was utterly frightened, not knowing what had happened or how. Trying again for the phone, he used his good hand, whilst his bad hand clutched close to his chest. "H-hello?" he tried to speak, but his voice wavered with worry. Frank felt himself exhale, only then realizing he'd been holding his breath. But Gerard's answer had, in fact, hade him even more worried. He sounded…distant. Scared. He sounded like a small child, lost. It made Frank visibly shudder with discomfort."Oh Gerard… How badly hurt are you?" he asked immediately, though stopped walking as he noticed the sound wasn't there to lead him. Gerard let out sharp breaths, somewhere close to hyperventilation. "Frank… oh God, what happened? I just woke up here…and… the glass…" he struggled to breath, confusion and worry suffocating him momentarily. He tried to think, resting his forehead on his knee tops. Trying his very hardest to keep calm himself, Frank let out another deep breath, moving back to the wall. "It's okay… okay? Just try to keep calm. You called me earlier.. Said you'd cut your hand, and that you'd been drinking. Can you remember?" he asked, surprised how well he was keeping his voice from breaking. Gerard frowned deeply, grimacing at himself. He felt ashamed at himself. He'd promised himself and the rest of the band a long time ago that he'd never get into that shit ever again. But… He lifted his head quickly, making it hurt badly. "Why?" he choked out. His brain racked. Remember, Gerard, remember. He let out a small gasp, pain taking over again. Oh, he broke up with you. "You…you...no, you wouldn't. You can't!" he shouted at Frank, putting his injured hand down without thinking to stand up and immediately collapsing back down in pain, letting out a loud cry. Not understanding what was going through the others mind, he waited, hearing the sharp quick breaths that Gerard made, and the small sounds when he moved. Though Gerard asked him a question, Frank continued to stay silent as he didn't understand, though he was getting more worked up now. As he heard his friends (yes, he would always be Frank's friend, no matter what) cry of pain, Frank's eyes widened and he began walking out of distress. "Gerard? Gerard! What's wrong? Oh God, tell me where you are, I need to find you…" he sounded desperate, practically begging. Gerard wouldn't mess around now as Frank could tell the alcohol was mostly out of his system. Gerard felt his chest ache as it had done before. But this was worse, so much worse. Because the reason stuck in his mind, refusing to let him forget. "Why?" he asked again, tears filling his eyes. He stood again, being more careful, though his legs still shook from the searing pain. "Why did you break up with me?" he elaborated, needing to know. Frank's breath caught as his eyes searched frantically. Then he saw it. 'London road'. It taunted him. He'd been looking for it all day, and he had to find it now. When Gerard had just asked him the question he'd never want to have to answer again. Dropping his phone in his haste, he ran quickly down the alley to his friend, barely noticing the others bad state as he immediately wrapped his arms round the other and pushed him back against the wall to hug him. Not only fear and shock ran through him, but terrible pain as he felt the other small arms curl around him. But apart from an initial cry, he gritted his teeth and bore it, needing to be close to him. He was safe now. Even though Frank possessed no way of protecting him, he knew he was safer now, just with him. After a moment, he pushed Frank away, pain of two kinds making him angry at the smaller man. "Why?" he hissed again. "Why did you do that to me?" he asked. As Frank was pushed, he went back without a struggle, thinking of Gerard's aforementioned wounds. But now Frank was utterly confused. He knew alcohol could mess up your memory, but Gerard must have worked out why they broke up by now. "I..I'm sorry, but.." he paused, eyes wide and dazed. "I told you.. I don't want what you want. If you actually wanted anything.." He finished, shivering a little, though it had nothing to do with the bitter cold. Gerard's eyebrows furrowed in a frown. Yes, he'd said that before. He'd said they didn't want the same things… But, he'd just accused Gerard of not wanting anything. His eyes narrowed, as he pressed back slightly against the wall, ignoring his pain. "What the hell are you talking about? What do you want?" Frank's eyes slid up to meet Gerards. He looked as bewildered as Frank did. Slowly, the small male's features twisted as he eyed the blood on the side of his friends head and the bloody handprint over his mouth. His eyes slid down to the others messed up hand. He felt his stomach lurch. He gulped, forcing himself to look away. "I want.." he paused. What? A life? A future? Of course, but that didn't sum it up. "You. I want you to be with me… forever. I want us to have a life together.. God knows what that means, but I want it all…" he cringed, wondering how he'd take rejection. Gerard stared at the other eying him and self consciously put a hand to his hair. He felt the dried blood, and shuddered gently. Letting his hand drop, he listened to the other. An odd sense of desire ran through him as Frank spoke. "Then why did you break up with me?" Gerard asked, frowning, not sure he was getting the main point. Looking up again, he rested his gaze on Gerard's eyes. "Because we don't want the same things.." he said as if it were obvious, though it still pained him. "It took me a while to figure it out…and.. I guess it's oka-""Frank, you're being stupid."He was a little startled, wondering why he was being insulted. "What? How?""Because I want all that too. God knows what gave you the idea I didn't. I told you, I love you and want to be with you forever."Something clicked in Frank and he took a step back, unsure what to think of that. "W-what?" he gasped, feeling a sudden relief as a weight was lifted from his chest, but also tense in case of an awful, sick, sadistic joke. Seeming sympathetic, but a little annoyed at the other, he took a few steps away from the wall, stumbling forwards to wrap the other in an embrace. "You're so stupid sometimes." Frank stayed completely still, body still tense and rigid. Then he felt Gerard's arms round him, and the others lips by his ear and couldn't help but relax. As his muscles contracted, he pulled his arms lightly round the other waist, tears falling from his eyes. Pressing their bodies close together, Gerard let out a soft noise of pain, though he didn't mean to. It just hurt so damn much. He regretted the noise immediately after, as Frank pulled away from him. Gerard sighed, knowing what would come next. "We have to get you do the hospital." Frank said simply, eyes on Gerard's. He could see the other was reluctant, but he wouldn't take no for an answer. "Oh, c'mon.. I'm sure if I just wrap it up.." he murmured, aware he'd probably have to have some kind of painkiller. Through a needle. He winced lightly, which Frank mistook for more pain. "No.." he craned his neck, glancing round at the others bloodstained trousers too. "You must have sat in it too.." he frowned, looking up at the other. "Don't you remember anything?" Gerard shrugged, shaking his head. "No.. I don't even remember buying the drink." he admitted, memories from before pretty hazy. "Can you walk okay?" Frank asked, knowing he probably wouldn't support the other all the way to the hospital. As Gerard nodded, Frank took his hand automatically. He had already assumed they were back together. Gerard didn't argue anymore, but simply nodded. "I think so." As his hand was clasped, he sighed gently, happily. Whatever had been running through Frank's mind had gone, and Gerard couldn't be happier. "Frank?"The small male looked up at him. "Yeah?" He smiled. "I love you." Frank felt his heart flutter. "I love you too, so much.."Gerard smiled back, not caring that his ass and hand burned like hell. Not caring that he would probably be chilled for weeks after sleeping in this alley. It didn't matter. Because this had turned out to make him feel to happy and warm inside that he felt ready to burst. "Don't let them put a needle in me, okay?" he asked, smiling through his anxiety. Frank giggled, squeezing Gerard's good hand. "No I.V's." he promised, and they began to walk. "Yeah, he's fine now. We're just coming back… I know, I'm sorry we had to cancel and everything.." Frank paused, biting his lip, watching Gerard, who smiled happily at him. Frank couldn't help but smile back, glancing down at the others bandaged hand. "Okay Mikey." He laughed. "Okay. Hold on." He pulled the phone slightly away from his ear. "Mikey says he loves you, Gerard." he grinned. Gerard held his hand out for the phone, and Frank passed it to him. "Hey Mikey… Oh yeah, Frank's taken great care of me." He paled slightly, feeling a little sick. "No, I wouldn't let them get me with it.." Frank heard Mikey laugh from where he was standing, and saw Gerard grin. Gerard's grin slipped away, and he looked down. "Yeah, I know. I'm sorry. Tell Ray and Bob that too." he paused. "No, screw that, I made you guys a promise, and myself. I'd never get into that shit again." As Mikey spoke, Gerard looked up at Frank's anxious and worried face. Gerard shook his head, showing he was okay. He sighed. "I know, Mikey. You're my brother, of course I love you." Frank smiled, glad the conversation had changed. "Okay… see you later. Bye." His voice was a little bleak, but he'd already cut off before Frank of Mikey could scold him. Frank watched Gerard for a little whilst he grabbed his phone and wallet, stuffing them into his pockets. Then he turned, looking back at the other. "What's wrong?" Gerard asked, and Frank realized he must have seen an expression Frank was unaware he was displaying. "Oh…nothing, really.." Gerard waited, not letting it rest. "It didn't look like nothing."The smaller male bit his lip lightly. "Oh, well.. I was just thinking. I mean, I got all confused before… I had no idea what you were thinking.." he paused, sighing. "I just want us to talk more, I want you to tell me what you're thinking. I know you can read me perfectly, but you're completely closed in." Smiling to himself, Gerard nodded. "Okay, Frank." he leaned down, so his lips were close to the others ear. "I'll make you a deal. We can talk as much as you want tonight.." he paused, moving a hand to the others ribs. "As long as we get to do something else after." Frank, by this point, was blushing deeply, his eyes wide. He shivered as Gerard kissed his neck lightly. "Well? Do we have a deal?" he whispered, grinning to himself as he pulled back from the always, Frank was left dazed by Gerard, he leaned forwards, clinging to the other. "Yes. But can we do yours first?" he asked, looking up at Gerard from underneath his hair. Gerard laughed, taking the others hand with his own good one. "You're so cute." Frank pouted gently, not thinking that answered his question. Sometimes he wish Gerard weren't so naturally good at seduction. It was annoying, not having any control of his body when the other was around. "I wish I could do that to you..""Do what?" Gerard asked, confused."Leave your head spinning, you know… make you feel all dizzy and like you have no control of your body. It's like a power or something." "You do that to me constantly, so I don't think me powers are as strong as yours." He looked up at him, surprised. "Really? I mean, you make me dizzy all the time, but I can basically keep a hold of myself.." He paused, biting his lip. Gerard raised one eyebrow at him. "You're really that influenced by me?""You didn't notice?""Not really." he said modestly. Frank laughed, leading them out of the hospital. "Bob was right about something." he grinned to himself. Gerard paused, thinking. He wondered whether he should ask what they had been talking about in the first place, but decided against it. It wasn't Bob's fault. "What's that?""Love really is deaf and dumb."**


	10. Chapter 10

For the most part so far, the walk back had been pleasant but quiet. Gerard seemed to be thinking, and Frank found it best not to disturb him. He had asked to know what the other was thinking, but not the instant he thought of it. He would ask later. Suddenly, Gerard looked down at Frank and smiled gently. "I think I'd better call Mikey again. Just to get them out of the house, y'know." He murmured, knowing by Frank's reddening cheeks that he understood. Frank hadn't thought he was completely serious, though he had hoped he was. Simply nodding, the smaller male squeezed Gerard's hand and pressed slightly closer to him. As he waited, phone close to his ear, Frank kept his eyes down. No doubt Mikey would ask why he wanted them out."Hey. Yeah, we're on our way back now… but… listen. Can you guys kind of, vacate for a while?"Frank stiffened, and Gerard squeezed his hand as he felt the others tense body. Gerard grinned lightly. "Let's just say, your bet will be settled."Frank's cheeks flushed madly and he tried to turn away, fidgeting to get rid of the uncomfortable feeling. "Me." Gerard's smile faltered. "But I'm not sure, y'know. Only time will tell." he paused, whilst Frank looked up at him curiously. "Yeah, sure… half an hour? Okay… bye, Mikey." he snapped his phone shut, stuffing it back in his pocket. For a while, he didn't notice the others eyes boring into him. Then he caught the others curious expression out of the corner of his eyes. He turned slightly. "What?""'Only time will tell'?" Frank asked, raising both eyebrows. Gerard couldn't help but grin. "It doesn't matter. I'll tell you after, okay? I don't want to mess it up." Frank's eyes narrowed, but he turned away, letting go of Gerard's hand. "Tell me." he said firmly, though it still had the same cute charm that stopped him from ever being threatening. "Honestly, it's not important..""Then tell me.""Frank, c'mon..""What? If it's nothing, then just tell me..""I don't want to. You'll understand why afterwards..""Maybe there won't be an afterwards. I don't think I want to anymore." Gerard sighed deeply, stopping walking and moving closer to Frank. "You really want to know?"Frank nodded eagerly, leaning slightly closer. "Mikey asked who I thought would…" he paused. "Be on top." Frank stared at him, not quite sure how to feel. 'Me', Gerard had said. "Oh.." Gerard watched him curiously, hoping for a better reaction. When he had none, he frowned. "Okay? Is that...okay?" he felt a little numb, but nodded lightly, figuring it didn't matter. They were equal in his eyes, but Gerard was more.. possessive, when it came to that stuff, so it didn't surprise him that he would see himself on top. "Yeah, it's fine." he grinned, taking the others hand again. "I'm glad you told me."Glad the other wasn't mad or anything, Gerard smiled warmly, beginning to walk again. He now felt a little guilty about making such an assumption. He didn't want to make it seem like he had any hold on Frank, but it was just what he perceived. He just hoped it wouldn't effect anything. "Oh.." Frank said after a while, looking up at Gerard, eyes curious. Gerard's own eyes trailed down to the smaller male and he raised one eyebrow questioningly, rubbing the back of the others hand with his thumb. "Well, I saw some lyrics and stuff on your desk… there was this one. I didn't bother reading it properly. It was all crossed out and stuff… what was it?" he asked, frowning, hoping Gerard would understand his babbling. Understanding flickered across his features, but Frank was surprised to find him looking sheepish. "Oh- uh, you don't have to tell me.. I just wondered.."Gerard smiled a small forced smile, shaking his head. "No, it's just that I never would have found the strength to tell you if you hadn't mentioned it. I wrote a song, for you." Frank felt his cheeks burn, though he smiled with gratitude. "Really? That's so cool… can you sing it for me later?" he asked, eyes 's own cheeks reddened a little, making a fine contrast against his pale skin. "Sure.. It's not done yet, though. I think it's the hardest thing I've ever written." he sighed gently. Looking down at the floor, the younger man paused for a few moments. "Why? I mean… you always manage to get such.." he stopped, not managing to get the right words. Gerard waited, keeping silent as he let Frank continue in his own time. "Emotion into your songs. I'm not even sure that's right.. It's like you've filled your soul with all things that make an effect on you… and each of your songs had just that little part of your soul. But it never gets any smaller, y'know. Each piece is as strong as the last…" he crinkled his nose, knowing if Gerard were in this position his explanation would be far more eloquent and worthy of a compliment. "I guess it's your soul in the songs that really gets to people.." Gerard watched him carefully, slowing his pace as Frank looked at the floor as he spoke. Gerard knew he was struggling for words, but he didn't know why. The words he was saying were just right, making a wide smile spread across his face. Coming from other people, sure, it made him extremely grateful and glad, but from Frank…well, that was a bit different. Instead of commenting on his explanation, he decided to actually answer the question. He probably shouldn't show his gratitude in public. "Well… I guess I put so much of what I feel into songs, all the stuff that's clear in my mind… but with you it's completely different. A lot of the time I don't know what I feel, because each time you say something you make me feel so different…" he frowned lightly. "Some of the things I feel I can't put into words. I can't make people understand what's going through my mind. It's supposed to be my 'talent', but it doesn't work much when it comes to you. As far as you're concerned, you make me feel ways that I've never felt before." Frank's heart throbbed with adoration. He said nothing, but kept his head down, a small smile on his face now. A happy smile, a smile that showed Gerard had just reflected all the things he had tried to say times before, but failed. "I'd say I love you," Frank murmured "But it doesn't compare to that." Gerard looking into Frank's eyes as he lifted his head and felt the understanding between them. The older male shrugged gently. "Yeah, but I know what you're really trying to say." he said, realizing his voice was quite low. Frank's smile twisted into a wicked grin, and he took a quick glance round before laughing. "Oh, fuck being poetic." he pressed closer to the other and went up on his tiptoes, pressing their lips together in a violent embrace. After Gerard had responded, they hadn't kissed long. They had to get back, and they were in public. Frank pulled away first, eyes distant and he moved back to the others side, and they began walking in silence. After a while, Frank giggled. "You did it again." he said, knowing they were close now. The kiss had left him wanting more and there would be no talking until he got it, he knew that much. "What?" Gerard asked, wondering whether he'd done something good or bad. "Left me all dizzy." Gerard grinned, quickening his pace. He had told Mikey to get himself and the others out in half an hour, so he hoped they would be open the door, Gerard gave only a quick look round before dragging Frank to his room, knowing his bed was bigger. "Eager?" Frank asked, giggling again, but knew he was tingling with anticipation himself. As Gerard turned back to him, Frank noticed the lust on his face, and pressed the door shut with his foot, letting his boyfriend lead him to the bed.


	11. Chapter 11

"Frank!" Mikey screeched and all three men turned their heads to see a petrified looking Frank standing in the doorway. "Come on! Join us." They all shuffled along so Frank could reluctantly join their circle. "Where's Gerard?" Frank asked quietly, knowing what they'd be asking him. Ray gave a grin. "He said something about buying you a present." Mikey tried to stifle his giggle. "I hope it isn't some weird sex-""Don't even bother!" Bob scolded Mikey, fixating his angry gaze on him, then relaxing as the male nodded and turned to Frank. "Yeah, he did say that but we weren't supposed to tell you, so act surprised, okay?"Giving a childish grin at the thought of Gerard buying him a present (not that it should matter, the whole band had bought him stuff before), he nodded. "Sure, I'm great at acting."Ray gave him an uneasy gaze. "You mean like the time you tried to convince us you were having a heart attack to get out of cleaning up?""T-that was different..""You didn't even know the symptoms! You just kept saying that you were fine, but in no state to move as your heart hurt too much."Frank looked down at the floor, scowling. "Well, I didn't exactly have time to research it. Besides, I know you guys would have made me clean out the cupboards on top."Bob rolled his eyes. "Only because you're the only one that fits."Sighing gently, Mikey raised his hand for quiet. "Right! Now isn't the right time to ponder on acting skills. There are far more important things to discuss."Frank cringed in preparation as Mikey took in a breath. "Tell us Frank- who was on top?!" Grinning widely, all of the men (even Bob) leaned in for an answer. Looking uncomfortable again, Frank sighed. They'd get it out of him anyway. "Gerard." He murmured quietly. Mikey whooped and raised a fist in triumph. "I told you! I knew Gerard would be! Hand over the money, Toro!" Frank looked across at Ray, who rolled his eyes indignantly and reached for his wallet. "You thought I'd be on top?" The small male asked. Ray looked across to him and shrugged. "I wasn't sure, but I was voting for you more." He then paused, looking down at his wallet. "Wait! There something else we haven't settle-" The door opened behind all of them and Gerard moved inside quickly, clutching only one bag. His eyes rested on them and he glanced at Frank who was eying the bag with interest. His eyes narrowed. "You told him, didn't you?" He asked, knowing he should never have trusted them. They looked back guiltily and Mikey smiled. "Sorry dude. I don't think Frank would mind if it was still wrapped though. We're having a talk.." Gerard didn't have to ask what it was about, but sighed in defeat and nodded, moving to his room to wrap the gift. Immediately Ray started again. "We still have to settle another thing… Frank, who was bigger?" he asked. Frank paused, then pulled a face. "I'm not sure." Mikey raised one eyebrow. "Didn't you look?" His cheeks reddened. "Yes, but I didn't check the size." Ray and Mikey looked disappointed, but Bob looked thankful he didn't know. Frank then let a smile slip onto his face. He bit his lip, wondering if he should. "Mm… can you guys give me a min? I'll come back." He promised. Mikey frowned, pouting a little. Frank sighed gently. "It'll settle your other bet." Ray and Mikeys' eyes lit up and they nodded, ushering him away. Frank stumbled down the hall, moving to Gerard room. "Hey Gee… can I come in?" "Yeah, just give me a sec.." Frank waited, but not for long as within ten seconds Gerard opened the door and let him in. Without another word, Frank took Gerard hand and led him to the bed, pushing him down onto it and fumbling with his belt and jeans button. Gerard looked mortified and tried to stop him. "Frank…what the fuck are you doing?" Looking up at him, the smaller boy smiled. "I'll only be a min and don't worry, the others know. " Still reluctant, Gerard tried to get Frank off but he was strong despite his size and threatened to bite Gerard if he didn't stop. Though still protesting, Gerard didn't try to stop him as Frank tugged down his jeans then boxers. Leaving him for a moment, he pulled down his own and compared, eyes narrowed as he did so. Still wide-eyed and terrified, Gerard waited until Frank was obviously finished and pulled both back up. "What the fu-" Too late. Frank fled from the room after pulling up his own boxers and jeans to tell the others. Sitting down in the circle once again, he smiled smugly. "I am. Not by much, though." Ray grinned, glancing at Mikey. "Looks like I don't owe you any money." Mikey rolled his eyes, sighing. Then Gerard caught his attention, now leaning on the doorframe and listening to their conversation. "So you just attacked me to settle their bet?" He asked, a little outraged. Frank turned to see him and shrugged, biting his lip and smiling lightly. "Sorry." Giving a frowned he shook his head. "Come on.." he said, not wanting to fight about it, though he was still angry. "I want to show you what I got you." As Frank stood, Gerard paused. "And you three better leave him alone or else I'll be the one attacking you." Despite how weird that sounded, all three men nodded, though Bob did try to tell him he hadn't been any part of it, but Gerard ignored him. Frank was excited beyond no belief but buried it and hopped along to Gerard's bed, settling himself down, fidgeting. Gerard watched him with a curious smile, opening his drawer up and pulling out the small parcel. Hesitating for a moment, the older male sighed and passed it to Frank. Though at Christmas he always did the obvious of ripping a box open with haste, he was careful with this and turned it in his hands, raising an eyebrow curiously. "Hmmm." "Open it.""Hmm…""Seriously, open it, it's bugging me.""I wonder..""Frank! Fucking hell, just open the damned thing."Giving a wide grin Frank nodded. "Okay!" He sing-songed and pulled back the paper. Inside was a jewellery box. He twirled that in his fingers and pulled the paper off properly. Something fell from the package and Frank's eyes followed its fall. He frowned and picked it up, seeing it was a folded up bit of paper. He put the box in his lap and unfolded the paper, eyes trailing across it. That was…familiar. He frowned gently, trying to remember where he saw it. Then he looked once again over the deep pen guage marks where the older male had obviously crossed out his mistakes. Then it clicked and he realised. "Lyrics?" he guessed before he'd actually read them. Gerard frowned. "You've seen them before?""Yeah, but I never read them.""Oh…well, I only just finished it.."Frank nodded his head absent-mindedly, eyes scanning across the words. Then he began to read slower, biting his bottom lip. As he watched the smaller boy read he tried to distract himself, realizing that Frank's criticism would mean everything to him. Right now he was regretting ever showing them to him. Maybe if he took them back now? Perhaps at a risk of insulting him, but it may be worth it. Once glance at Frank's face showed it was too late. Gerard's eyes widened as he realised the other had tears in his eyes. That bad? "Gee.." He finally put the paper down. Etched messily was the title 'Search over'. Without another word Frank got up and pulled his arms quickly round the others back and hugged him tightly. (He would have gone for the neck, but he wasn't quite tall enough to do so comfortably.) Completely surprised, Gerard hugged him back, then leaned back slightly. "Gee, why didn't you show me before?" he complained, wiping his tears on his sleeve and looking up at Gerard. "Oh.. I dunno. I didn't think you'd like it much." "W-what?""Well… I dunno.""You're a retard."That one stumped Gerard and he frowned."You are. That was beautiful."Gerard now blushed. "Well, it's not that good… I mean it's really hard to write anything about you. I had to make it obvious what I was thinking, but what was I thinking? I had no idea." Frank listened to his incoherent babble and moved back to the bed, taking the paper and folding it back up and placing it in his jeans back pocket. "I know. This… stuff makes me confused too…" Moving to sit next to him, the older male sighed. "Yeah, but I managed to get it out just about. Here.." He passed him the jewellery box. Frank eyed it for a moment before lifting the lid. Inside was what looked like a small silver gun on a chain. His eyes widened and he took it in two fingers, twirling it round. On the back, engraved, was 'lock and load'. So cheesy, but so amazing. "I know what you're gonna say, it's really weird and how the hell does a gun express love or whatever.." "Actually, I was gonna say that I love it and do I get a proposal too?"Gerard stared at him for a moment, eyes lighting up. "Okay!" He snatched the box back and got down on one knee. Frank watched him quizzically, though he knew what was coming. Or was it? Surely Gerard wouldn't.."Frank Anthony Iero.." Oh no. Oh yes! He was going to!"Will you…marry me?"Frank felt his heart skip a beat. Surely not. It must be a practical joke or something. Gerard could not have just asked to marry him and been completely right in the head. "Uh, Frank? You're harming my pride by not answering.." "Oh! You're serious? I thought I was dreaming or… y'know, dead or something.""You're not dead yet. In the meantime, yes or no?"Again he paused, eyes wide with wonder. "Oh God, yes!" He leaned forwards and toppled off of the bed, pushing Gerard back with him as they locked in a passionate embrace. Then Gerard made them stop for a moment whilst he put the box safely on the side, but straight after they were back to it, giggling and kissing their happiness away. Eventually, they huddled together and simply grinned like idiots, wondering how the hell it would work. But that didn't matter. It was impulse, meant to be. Did they even allow that in this state? Probably not. Well, they'd find a state that did. "Ugh…""What?""I haven't even told my parents I'm with you. Imagine what they'll say when I'm marrying you.""Frank…you worry too much. You're parents are nice, they'll understand."He glanced at Gerard and smiled. "I don't think I care if they don't right now." They kissed again. "I need to tell Mikey.""Cool! I'll tell Bob and Ray!" The smaller boy leaped up, heading out of the room screaming 'I'm getting married!'Gerard grinned, following him into a room of slack jaws and wide-eyes. "Wait! Who's name are we taking? I don't think Frank Way sounds right. Plus we already have two Ways in the band.." "What the hell are you talking about!?" Mikey screamed. Gerard grinned sheepishly. "We're getting married.""When did you deicide this?""Well… about ten minutes ago actually."Mikey gave him a worried look. "Are you sure?"Pausing a little, Gerard glanced at Frank who looked about ready to burst. "Yeah, I am." Moving from the coffee maker, Mikey gave a wide smile. "Then I'm happy for you guys!" He wrapped Gerard in a hug and gestured for everyone to join. So they did. The band had the first full joined hug they'd had in ages. "Frank…honestly, don't you think you're being a bit impulsive? I mean, I approve and support that you love Gerard, but marriage!""Mom…please, you know I want this. It will go well, you don't know what's it's like between us.""Well… I just hope for both your sakes that you're right.""Thanks, mom. I'll be careful.""You'd better be. I guess I'll be the one to tell your father, then?"Frank grimaced. "Sorry."On the other end of the line he heard his mother sigh gently. "It's fine dear. I'll call you tomorrow to tell you when we can get down there, okay?""Sure, mom. Bye!""Bye dear." The line went dead and Frank chucked his phone onto the side, finally meeting his anxious fiancées gaze. "Well?""Well what?""How did she take it?"Frank smiled lightly. "She's going to help us plan it, but she kept warning me..""She would, she only wants to protect you.""I suppose…well, I'm just glad she didn't try to stop me.""I never thought she would have. Besides, there was always plan B.""…B?" He asked hesitantly. "Eloping! Silly!" Frank felt faint but giggled. "We're all over the world anyway, I don't see eloping helping, but… sure." Gerard smiled and moved close to Frank, kissing his forehead lightly. "Only eight weeks and we'll be married." he whispered. "Yeah…Gee?" he murmured. "Mh?""Who's the wife? Thing is, my legs aren't that nice, and you'd look much better in drag.""You… are you an idiot, or do you actually want someone to play the wife?""Well.. It'd be fun.""And you want me to be the wife?""Yes."Gerard gave the small male an odd look. "Alright, but I get to pick my dress.""You're very accepting." He smiled, snuggling to Gerard's chest. "I have to be with you.""I love you.." "I love you too."


End file.
